The Braggart's Disease

When we have a strong desire  to be appreciated and recognized but feel we are not, some of us will resort to the strangest schemes to solve our problem. A bulletin for priests recounts two such schemes, selected from a book of essays the writer had read many years before.

A woman in China who had an exquisite bed wanted to boast about it to the  whole world.  Since it was in her bedroom, showing it off to others would be difficult. She needed to find a way to brag about her bed that would seem reasonable.  She decided to spread the rumor  in the neighborhood that she was sick. This would bring many to her house and bedroom where they would see the bed and envy her. At the same time there was another woman who had a beautiful underskirt and was searching for a way to brag  about it.

Here again, since it was an underskirt she needed to find a way to brag about it without seeming to do so. She had heard about the woman who was sick and decided to visit her, and while there find a way to brag about her underskirt. Two women with the same hidden agenda are about to meet, one wanting to brag about her bed, the other wanting to brag about her underskirt. 
 
The woman with the underskirt, during the visit, did not ask about the problem the sick woman was having;  she was intent only in showing off her underskirt while she was sitting in the chair by the bed. She looked to see if the woman in the bed was looking at her underskirt. The woman in the bed noticed that the woman didn't show any interest in why she was in bed, and so concluded that she was there to show off her underskirt. The woman with the underskirt realized she hadn't asked the woman in bed the reason for her being in bed, and started showing some interest. The woman in the bed then told the woman with the underskirt that they both had the same disease: the braggart's disease.

This desire to be appreciated, says the writer,  comes from our trying  to free ourselves from the feeling of inferiority, and can bring about many personality problems. When this feeling of inferiority takes over, we become interested in externals, and vanity grows,  which makes for an unhealthy inner life. Instead of living according to our philosophy of life and convictions we are overly  concerned about what others may think about us, which makes it difficult for us to live an authentic life. 

When we look at ourselves with the eyes of faith, however, we notice that we have little to boast about, and are able to see more clearly our weaknesses. Even if we should find that there are things we can be proud of, looking at them carefully we notice that they have not been all our doing, having to acknowledge that we have received help from others, from family, from our environment, from God. With these thoughts we are humbled and begin to see our self more honestly.

"The greatest among you will be he one who serves the rest. Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled, but whoever humbles himself shall be exalted" (Matt.23:11).

 

What the Korean Martyrs Can Teach Us

In one of  Korea's  best selling novels an American is walking on a country road, sometime before the Korean War, when he sees a Korean couple: the man is riding a donkey, the woman walking behind him, puffing. The American asked the man if he knew about the 'ladies first' custom. The man said it was not Korean custom.

After the Korean War, the American returned to Korea and on the same road he met something quite different from what he had seen before the war. The woman was riding a donkey and the man was walking quite a distance behind. Things really have changed in Korea, he murmured to himself. But when he heard the reason for the change, he was stunned speechless.  After the war many still-unexploded land mines were thought to be in the area, and the man was being careful by having his wife go first. In the past, this thinking was expressed in the  short phrase: the domination of man over woman.  In  View from the Ark in the Catholic Times, the columnist, with tongue in cheek, says the men are making a big fuss over the changes.

One humorous story making the rounds, she says, among the many now being heard, is the one about a department store for husbands, where women can go to select the perfect marriage partner. You start on the first floor and proceed from there to the upper floors, each floor having better quality "merchandise" until arriving finally at the top floor, the fifth. 

One day, two women entered the department store. On the first floor, the welcoming sign said that the husbands on that floor had jobs and were good to children.  This was not bad, the women agreed, but they wanted to see what was on the second floor.  Here, they were told the husbands make a lot of money, are good to children and were also good looking. On the third floor, the husbands, besides having the qualities of the husbands on the first two floors, would help in doing the household chores. The husbands on the fourth floor had the qualities of the husbands on the other floors but also possessed romantic personalities. The two women, still not satisfied, were now set for seeing what 'jackpot' awaited them on the fifth floor, feeling their high expectations were soon to be realized. The sign on the fifth floor said: "Better to live alone. You want too much."

The columnist reminds us that women in the patriarchal society of the past greeted Catholicism with great hope: Before God all were equal. This teaching was felt by many as freeing the souls of our women. In the new list of those to be beatified, 24 of the 123 are women. She feels we need more stories telling us about our women martyrs.

One of these martyrs is Kang Wan-suk (Columba) who  was a leader in the early years of the Church in Korea. She was subjected 6 times to the leg-screw torture (a twisting of the legs with two sticks inserted between them). They wanted to find out where the Chinese priest Fr. Chu Mum-mo was hiding. She never uttered a word. When she heard of his death, she wrote her reminiscences and gave it to a Christian, but this has been lost. She died by beheading at the age of 40.

In Korea today there is of course no fear of dying like the martyrs but we can live, she says, with the same spirit of humility and emancipation.  Before blaming another, she urges us to look deeply at ourselves. And as a seeker after truth give thanks for everything, helping those who are struggling in our society. Isn't this the proper way, she asks, to live the spirituality of the ancient martyrs in each day of our lives in the 21 century?

Understanding the Culture of the Internet

On the subways almost everybody is busy with their smartphones, the ever present sign of the digital world we are now living in. A marriage of digital technology and the new media. The results of this marriage make possible a wide range of personal relationships and creativity never before even imagined. Thanks to digital technology we are being tied together, willingly or not, by accessing, via computer, the world wide web. The smartphone has become for many another appendage to the body.

A priest who has studied  mass media and religion reflects, in his column in the Catholic Times, on the social  results of this digital world. Anything that comes to us as new has as its foundation, he points out, something from the past which has made it possible. What is totally new, he says, can't produce anything meaningfully new; mixing two things completely new and presenting them to the public will, he believes, only be greeted with perplexity.  Consequently, the inventor has to prepare the public to receive the new product. Apple, the computer manufacturer, prepared their advertising to make their ground-breaking products readily acceptable to the public.

In a word, the new media is not something completely new. Within it, we have the technology from the past: the button and the switch, which enables us to move to a new step in the evolution of the media. Although it may present some initial problems, we are soon able to follow the changes that are taking place.

We may use the new technological improvements but their  implications and actual reality is something else. If someone spends the whole day in front of the monitor shopping, he is not necessarily knowledgeable about the internet. The office worker seated before a monitor all day long also may know little about how the internet works. Being able to use the internet, as consumers, does not necessarily mean understanding the internet. Those who are managing the internet are supplying us with what we want, and they want us to use what is offered, the priest says, and not to bother to look any deeper.

We can try to get to know what is going on but it is very difficult for most of us. What we can't overlook is what has led up to the new media. Besides being an industry, technology, content, an aspect of the culture it is a text we have to decode. In conclusion it is the enviroment in which we live.

 

Those working in the  media, however, are busily and continually reading us, intent on learning our preferences. "Would you possibly be interested in this article?" and similar queries often appear unbidden on our computer screens. Media's ability to determine our preferences can give us goosebumps.

It is now time for us to read what they are about--from being read to reading them.

K- pop And Meaning

K-pop is the abbreviation for Korean popular music. A priest studying overseas writes in his diocesan bulletin about the popularity of this mixed music genre: electronic, hip hop, pop, rock, and rhythm and blues, with its high spirits, catchy rhythm and well-done  choreography. Not only is K-pop popular in Japan, China and throughout South Asia but it has spread to Europe and the United States. 

He recalls a time last year when one of these K-pop songs caused a great sensation, becoming extremely popular. It had a lively rhythm, was easy to sing, and the choreography was comical. The vocalist, with   show-stopping attire, caught people's attention. Walking the streets of the city, you would hear the song coming from  many different places. The lyrics were easy to remember, and without  paying much attention to the song, he found himself muttering the words to himself. Later, he checked to see if the words were saying anything; there was, he said, no meaning he could make out, though the rhythm was lively and full of fun.

There is no intention, he says, to criticize the vocalists who sing such songs, but when songs have no discernible meaning but are entertaining only because of their lively rhythm and appealing choreography, it may tell us, he says, something about the culture we are making. Are we losing the desire to search for meaning? he asks. Isn't this the tendency we are seeing in our society today?

The songs we remember from the past, our best-loved songs, are the ones with meaning. Anything with meaning, not only songs, continues to remain in our memories. Nowadays, it seems that whatever is lively or interesting or entertaining is enough to grab our attention.

When teaching  students in his Sunday school program, he often hears the phrase "This is not fun; I don't like doing it." If we attempt to find meaning in what we do, without making it also entertaining, the chances are, he says,  that our students will not want to do it.

The mass media gives us many cultural ways of enjoying ourselves. The variety of entertaining possibilities are countless but if that is all we are looking for, we are missing a great deal. Before asking: Is that amusing and fun, we should ask what meaning could it have for me?  More important than looking for amusement and fun would be to look for what is long-lasting and profitable.

An objective, abiding meaning that can be discerned in life events is frequently thought not to exist; for many of us everything has merely short-term meaning. Trying to discover a more lasting meaning is considered illusion. The attempt is often made to fill the emptiness that comes with these thoughts with fun, entertainment and pleasure, only to finally realize their changing and impermanent nature, returning us once again to the emptiness.

The on-going search for meaning in our lives is essential. Those with some type of belief that enables one to continue searching will not be disappointed. A good book that has influenced many in their search for meaning is Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning. 

Trust Between Generations

The first step in mutual understanding, says a college professor, is to realize that others  may not know the same things you do. Asked by an elementary school teacher to speak to her class, he talked to them about the war between North and South Korea, which began, he noted for the benefit of the class, on June 25, 1950. He was surprised that the students commented on his remembering the date but they knew nothing about the war. How could they not know about the war? he wondered.

This year new students, born around the year 1995, will be entering his college class. What kind of introduction will he prepare for the course they will begin? If what is said does not register with them, they will be perplexed. Just one generation away from their present reality may be all that is necessary for not understanding what many take for granted. This is not the students fault, he says; it is something that has been true in the past for all generations.

Whether teaching the younger generation as students, as workers, or dealing with them in other capacities, it is necessary to acknowledge, he says, the inevitable  gap that exists in Korea between the generations, a feeling of distance that  can give rise to distrust. Moreover, the pace of change in Korea has been one of the fastest in the world. Consequently, the older generation sees the younger generation as thoughtless, and the younger sees the older as "old fogies."  He admits that he has also spoken to these "old fogies" himself without the openness he felt he should have had. But it was, he admits, his way of feeling comfortable with them. 

This kind of relationship--where we lack the desire to communicate and the generation gap only allows us  to relate with others as strangers so as not to confront honestly and openly with one another--will it not, he asks, make this society a living hell? A  society that has lost its reason and trusts only in strength only adds, he believes, to the ill  feelings between classes. In a  recent survey among 21  developed countries  53 percent said they would have to take responsibility for their old age. The highest percentage of all the countries. Expectations on a nation's welfare system and trust in the government was one of the lowest of all the countries and he does not see this as  a sign of the elders' spirit of independence. Nor do we have the younger generation feeling the burden of taking care of the older generation. There is no feeling of solidarity between the generations.

Openness between the generations is absent, and it is the older generation, he believes, that has to first  extend their hand. They have to understand the current of the times, the young people's sensibilities and worries. The older generation needs to show the younger generation that they are interested  in having a meaningful encounter with them, and make all the efforts necessary to rid themselves of the obstacles to such an encounter. Kindness shown the younger generation, says the professor, will likely be returned in kind. Without this effort nothing will change.

Pope Francis has used the phrase 'the culture of encounter': "People express themselves fully only when they are not merely tolerated but know they are truly accepted." Opening ourselves to the other should be a mark of all of us. It would do much to change the society we live in.

Making Our Lives a Poem

In the Taegu diocesan bulletin a priest introduces us to a poem by  Sister Lee Hae-in:  "May my prayer to you be like a  poem/ May all my days by resting in you/ become more pleasing with the passage of time/ like the words of a poem/ At times unsuitable words were used/ May I  have the courage to get rid of them/replaced by the beautiful words of a poem I want to live by."

From a very early age, the priest has been attracted to poetry. Reading poetry was, for him, he says,  like taking  a bath, his spirit was refreshed. It was like washing away the  accumulated dirt on the soul, his head and heart becoming clear. His desire is that his life be like a living  piece of poetry.

The Korean poet Ku Sang said "Poetry has to be  part of society." Khalil Gibran, a Lebanese artist, poet and writer (1883-1931) had this to say about poetry "There are beautiful poems given to us / When we are able to sing those poems / we have God's sufficient protection." The paralyzed Korean poet Lee Sang Youl said in one of his poems "Let  Brahms' music flow in our lives/ and let us fill our lives/ with the paintings that show/ the passion and leisure of Gauguin." There needs to be poetry in our lives, the priest says. When we are able to live like a piece of poetry, we will have the leisure and passion to live a more fulfilling life. Poetry is beautiful, aromatic and gives light; it charms and has zest. Is there anything better than that?  he asks.

At the ordination of priests in the diocese he had the occasion to be present at one of the ordination ceremonies.  In his talk to the priests he used the poem of Sister Lee and  told the priests to make their lives like a poem: as beautiful and as fragrant as a poem, and to get rid of anything that is unnecessary in presenting the beauty of our lives.  He asked them to be like a poem: simple, with nothing unnecessary. It is then that we will have a beautiful piece of poetry, often having to become small and poor, sitting in the last place. The best living poem, the one with the most fragrance. has been the life of Christ as given to us in the Gospels.

The article concludes with his hope that this ideal will also be the dream of all of us: to become a living poem as  Christ has been. There are many who are living, he believes,  this kind of life in the world today. He wants Christians to hold this up as an ideal. We don't want to be giving off the aroma that comes with an improper attachment to the world, but the aroma that comes from a closeness with Jesus and the Gospels.

Jesus came to give us extraordinarily high ideals: "Be perfect like your heavenly Father." You can't beat that as an ideal. We all fall short, obviously, and the solution is not to jettison the ideal, but to keep on working and expecting help from the one who loves us and gives us help. As Catholics, the ideals are high but the mercy shown can be described  as equally high,  provided we don't give up on our ideals. And we should not forget that the results  wash away the dirt, giving a new fragrance to the  gift of  life we  have been given.

Catholicism as Seen by Society in Korea

Polls,surveys, and questionnaires are not always the best way of knowing how a particular group, society or organization is seen by the public but it does tell us something which is of value.

Catholicism is still seen by the ordinary Korean  as the religion which has the most trust.  A Protestant research group made a survey of a thousand citizens according to the percentages in which they are in society. Of the 1000, 10.1 percent were Catholics, Protestants numbered 22.5 percent, Buddhists, 22.1 percent, and non- believers 48 percent.  The number of Catholics had the lowest number of participants but the Catholics had the highest number of those who found Catholicism trustworthy, because 32.7 percent of the non-believers gave Catholicisms high marks.

What some found of interest was that 13.3 percent of the Buddhists and 11.9 present of the Protestants thought Catholicism most worthy of trust. 88.7 percent of the Catholics  considered their religion  the most trustworthy of the religions, the highest of any group. Protestantism was 75 percent and Buddhism was 69.5 percent.

Catholicism did come out as the religion with the most trust but  there was a drop of 11.9 percent from 41.1, compared to 2009.  During  this same period of time the Protestants rose 1.3 percent.

Recently the question of religion and politics was acute and 74 percent of the respondents were against the religious  participation in politics. Only 23.1 percent were in favor. Of the Catholics 76.7 percent were against participation. The professor responsible for the survey said one of the reasons for the decline would be the Catholic priests disputing the Northern Limit Line ( NLL  the maritime waters that separate the  North from the  South). The survey was taken shortly after the the opinion of the priests was made public.

The religion that has been most evolved in service to the public was Protestantism with 35.7 percent.  Catholicism was 29.3 percent and Buddhism was 13.2  percent. Catholicism dropped from 37.9 percent in 2010  to 29.3 percent.  Protestantism stayed pretty much where it was in 2010.

The whole idea of what is meant my participation in politics is not clear, but what is clear is Catholics either do not understand what it means to participate in society or they do not like the way it is done. Since you have such a high number of Catholics who do not appreciate what they see is reason enough to try to make some distinctions so that work for justice remains more than praying for justice.