Office of statistics recently published their figures for the number of suicides for the year 2016. Numbers for teenagers has been dropping from 2011 but the 2016 statistics show an increase from the previous year from 4.2 persons per 100,000 to 4.9. All the other age groups except for the teens and those in the twenties showed a decrease.
A religious sister in charge of a center for the prevention of suicides writes about the issue in the Catholic Times for this week. She mentions that those who have studied the issue see the problem emerging because of a large number of young people out of work, the break up of families, and the lack of hope in the future.
Internet and dramas on TV have contents that incite this kind of thinking. Studies bring stress, no longer do they believe that with success in their studies they are guaranteed a good job and a good life. The dream is disappearing and they are faced with big challenges for the future.
Problems arise for the young since they are maturing, they are not adults and do not have the experience to accept the negativity in their life and the strength and knowledge to overcome what they face. They do not find it easy to rationalize and intellectualize what they encounter and can easily blame themselves for the situation they face.
Whether this is coming from others or oneself they have difficulty facing the situation and the stress urges them on to end it all. She has interviewed many adults at the center and not a few when they were in their teens contemplated suicide. This is reason enough to work in the prevention of suicide among our young people.
The ranking of the Korean youth in comparison to other countries in the OECD on the level of happiness is at the bottom. They have been there for the last 6 years but also ranked high for violence in the home, and both physical and emotional abuse. This is often expressed with others and can turn towards oneself and suicide.
Adults need to see the potential and possibilities of our young people and not be quick to evaluate and condemn them. They need to be respected and helped to find themselves. Adults need to empathize and help them find their dreams.
She ends her article with a few lines of a poem by a Korean poet:"I have failed, misfortune was present but again I go toward hope for in me there are still flowers that have yet to blossom. I have worked to give bloom to the flowers that others wanted and neglected the flowers that I wanted and are still waiting to bloom" (Literal translating of meaning).
A few years ago a high school student left a note for his mother just before he jumped to his death from a high-rise apartment. The note was only a few words: "I did it." He succeeded getting the grades his mother desired and ended his life.
Success and competition as a standard have put Korea at the bottom in ranking for happiness and high in the number of youthful suicides. A teacher and authority in the field of education gives the readers her ideas for the education of the whole person in an article in the Kyeongyang magazine.
Whole person education is a topic whose sphere is immense. However, there is a loud cry to center it on the virtue of empathy. It includes understanding another person's situation, sympathizing and going beyond to empathy. Responding correctly to the situation with sentiments that will enable a heart to heart meeting with the other.
Surprisingly the ability to empathize with another is not that common. Gender, environment, genes all influence our actions and often fosters quarreling and conflict. Living within a community without resolving these problems we will not find happiness.
The differences between us and the other is a reality we have to acknowledge if empathy is to enter. The pivotal point is how to overcome the differences.
There are programs used in different countries at present and the Canadian experience was mentioned where a kindergarten teacher has worked with nurturing empathy among children with the results that after a year even the frailest of the children were not exposed to aggression or any type of serious bullying. These programs are being spread to many parts of the world.
Need to understand we are beginning from different values and moral points of view. By discussion, communication we can narrow the differences. This is done with words. With verbal and nonverbal means we can succeed in interacting with one another.
Secondly, there are those who with words can communicate with another. They have read a lot, experienced much, and have feelings that are common to many. A person that gets along with others has a wide field of understanding and is able to express this in his dealings with others. This requires reading and experience.
Empathy is different from sympathy. Sympathy is vertical while empathy is horizontal. It's walking in the shoes of the other and wanting to experience what the other experiences.
"Don't live so fast!" The priest writer remembers these words of a shopkeeper on a visit to a market with his mother when he was a seminarian. On the way home, with a smile on her face: "The stranger seeing my son for the first time, sized you up correctly didn't he?" With these words, a seminary rector gives us a meditation on habit written up in Bible Life magazine.
Impetuosity was one of his faults. From a young age, he always found it difficult to patiently work on anything for any period of time. A habit that influenced his life negatively and he wanted to gain control.
He looked for tangled messes of thread and patiently unraveled them. Did this cure his impetuosity? No, it continued to be present but working with tangled messes, he was able to tame his old friend.
We should never underestimate the power of habit. On television, he recalls a program using hidden cameras that followed some performers during a whole day picking out their good and bad habits. The cameras highlighted: habits of eating salty and spiced foods, eating fast, drinking liquor at night, missing eating time, exercise, breathing deeply, and their way of sitting. We are ruled by our habits.
A habit found at three will go to eighty. A Korean proverb which shows that children under three are not conscious of themselves but this changes. Scary is the knowledge that the habits we pick up at that age will last a lifetime.
From Latin, we have the word 'fortune and virtue'. Fortune is good luck, experienced without preparation, while virtue is the selection of the good with deliberate practice and repetition, a continual choice that becomes a virtue.
Evil acts, whether it is today or tomorrow we don't know, the results will not be good. Like the evil acts, good acts that are repeated countless times will become part of who we are.
At a meeting, the writer mentions they were talking about the healthy teeth of an older gentlemen. In the conversation that followed the gentleman gave his secret which very simply was to brush your teeth with devotion 3 times a day. Doesn't seem a very serious secret method but after some thought, he did agree.
My habits will determine my future. Not only physical health habits but also spiritual health habits. The habits of prayer, thanksgiving will make the future one of hope. Do our spiritual health habits have the same weight as brushing our teeth? They should.
When priests make their opinion known on the pros and cons of specific government policies some of the believers feel the priests are getting involved in politics and criticize them. Writing in the Catholic Peace Weekly a lay staff member of the newspaper mentions that he also gets questions on the issue from the readers.
He answers: "It would be a problem if the priests were to make political statements or take a political position. But I don't think it is right to oppose the remarks as political if it is a statement for the common good and social justice."
It's clearly a problem when priests support a certain political party but reasonable to expect a priest to make clear the Church's teachings on various political, economic and social issues to help people make right choices. Of course, judging and deciding is the conscientious choice of the believers.
How many political parties meet the ideal values that the church teaches? "It is difficult for the concerns of the Christian faith to be adequately met in one sole political entity; to claim that one party or political coalition responds completely to the demands of faith or of Christian life would give rise to dangerous errors. Christians cannot find one party that fully corresponds to the ethical demands arising from faith and from membership in the Church. Their adherence to a political alliance will never be ideological but always critical; in this way, the party and its political platform will be prompted to be ever more conscientious in attaining the true common good, including the spiritual end of the human person" (Compendium of the Social Doctrine #573).
Change of government started five months ago and still has a high approval rating with the citizens in its efforts for reform and getting rid of corruption. Many citizens approve but there are those with expectations who are concerned and waiting to see.
Our columnist doesn't like the direction the government is going and is concerned. Seven high-ranking candidates failed to be confirmed for government positions. The thinking among many in government says those appointed must have the right national philosophy.
The problem is that with this sharing of the national philosophy those who have helped give birth to the new regime are preferred over those with expertise in their field, competence, and morality. If the help the candidate gave the party is more important than qualifications for the job then the columnist feels we are just bringing more corruption into the system and asking for trouble.
The American futurist Jeremy Rifkin, in his book "The Age of Empathy" reminds us: 'Humans are basically a sympathetic species' recalling the history of humanity's loss of empathy in the civilization of competition and exclusivity. We need a new paradigm of empathy and networking that we have lost and need to regain. So begins an article by a seminary professor in the Catholic Times.
Empathy is not merely sympathizing with another, understanding with the mind another's feelings and situation. Rather it is to participate and share in the feelings and to want to become one in the experience of the other. He personally has come to use the word often and realized that in the last century humanity experienced exclusion, conflict and selfish greed making it difficult to practice living together with others harmoniously.
In the past, the traditional society rejected values and ways of life that were not passed down. Modern society does not reject the different and what one considers error but wants to engage with the other in dialog and cooperation.
This new spirit of empathy in society has a great effect on the sense of faith of the believers living in the community of faith. Our journey of faith is different, we have a sense of sin, suffering, love and hate, wounds inflicted and conscious of the world's deception in moving us towards death: determined to seek freedom, peace, joy, holiness which is no different from others.
Our spiritual senses, in daily life, naturally go in search of what feels good, doing what is beneficial is done repeatedly and becomes second nature, a virtuous act. Helps me make the right decision in life and reinforces my intuition and makes it grow.
Isn't this what happens with those who read the Scriptures, attend the liturgy with joy, and enjoy praying alone? They will take the difficult tasks in the parish, spend time with the community, look for ways of being of service. This is because they are at peace internally and experience joy in their life.
Not all believers, however, express this sense of faith. There are those who do not go along with the expression of the faith of others and prefer to discriminate instead of empathizing."I am different from them," individuality and interest become predominant and in community, complaints become commonplace. It's not easy to accept differences whether from a feeling of superiority or inferiority.
In society, we have the explosion of conflict on the international scene instead of a desire for coexistence with dialogue and consensus. What is true in society is also found within the church community. We are a spiritual community led by the Holy Spirit if we are to be a sign of joy to the world then in our Christian communities we need to develop a spirit of sympathy and cooperation.
A mature community needs to develop and to experience this life of faith if we are to be a leaven in society. Is this not what Pope Francis wants to see in our communities, where God's people testify to the gospel and become a community of communication and fellowship and light and salt to the world?
"Once bullied you will come to your senses!" This is a statement that comes from the past. A professor at a university writes in the Kyeongyang magazine about exclusion from a group and a just society. He mentions a younger student at the graduate school he was attending who was always smiling and liked by all his seniors.
At the end of the year, new students entered the graduate school and the popular young student had juniors under him. One of the entering students was not following the norm of the graduate school and his individuality stood out among the students. The popular student addressed the new student with some harsh words on his strange behavior which changed the atmosphere of the graduate school.
In our structured society taking circumstances into consideration and admonishing and criticizing is a common procedure when persons do their own thing and don't understand the atmosphere. This is an attempt to discipline them to join the group. It's no big deal. This is the reality not only in schools but in the military and the workplace.
The one being bullied knows there is a reason for the bullying and is slow to make it known and those who join in the bullying have a reason to justify it.
A special word is used for bullying in Korea which did not make its appearance until the 1990's although other expressions were always present. The professor wants us not to use the ambiguous word but to express what is being done by calling it 'violence' towards the person and 'ostracizing' the person.
In the last section of the article, he tells the readers that our society is cruel to those that don't follow the crowd and show this by disciplining the person. Consequently, persons who are different find it difficult to exist within a group and are left out in the cold.
In Korea, there is yet to be a Nobel Laureate in the sciences and he feels that one of the reasons is the way the culture continues to level the playing field. Those who stand out in the crowd for one reason or another are considered to be unlucky and odd balls. They find it difficult to continue being who they are.
Those who have changed the world in which we live have been creative thinkers and have done things differently from others and were considered 'unfortunate persons' but in the long run, have helped the larger society to which they belong.
Creativity is a personal quality but also a gift to society. When people in this mold are allowed to live like everybody else we will have a just society.
This year was the 25th year of the formal beginning of the Small Christian Communities in Korea. The movement had already been incorporated in parishes but the Seoul diocese was the first diocese to make it part of their pastoral planning.
Last year a questionnaire was given to a number of the participants to find ways to improve and examine the reality of what has happened.This has been done before but this is the first time they have made an in-depth study. The results of the study have been reported in both Catholic Weeklies, much space was devoted to the survey and the results.
The Small Christian Community movement was imported from South America. The four elements of community: fellowship, sharing the word of God, prayer and service all have their place.
The results of the survey showed a need to adapt it to the life in the city. A symposium on the results proposed the meeting of different age groups and different interests groups but the fear of dividing the community was strongly expressed. The younger groups have shown a decrease in attendance and the elderly have increased.
Comparing those who participated in the monthly or weekly meetings and those who did not, in most cases there was a difference in the participation in parish life. Participants were more active in difficult works, more active in church activities, read the Scriptures more often, and had a better understanding of the liturgical year. More interested in the poor, helping others, and helping financially, however, the difference was slight.
The issue that was noticed and commented on was the lack of interest in social matters where those who did not attend the weekly or monthly meeting showed a higher interest in social concerns, although this was only a minimal difference. This was unsettling in what it was saying to the diocese. The church has not been living the teachings of the Second Vatican Council.
Materialism, individualism, and worldliness has influenced the church greatly. The Holy Spirit has been with the movement and in the years ahead efforts will be expended to make it a leaven for the whole church community.
Crisis are opportunities for change. It takes time to change our physical condition so also the change for the better in the small community meetings. By a process of trial and error this will improve. The problems discovered will be the fertilizer that will help the movement to improve.
