One of our Maryknollers who died in 2002, Fr. Roman Theisen, wrote a booklet titled People I Love. In the dedication he wrote: " The Good Lord has Blessed me with His Love and with the Love of many good Friends both in my homeland and in the "Field Afar". I will, at times, take from the booklet and paraphrase his vignettes for the blog.
Between the Parish and the Tribunal I was swamped with work, and already tired just thinking of it.
The Sister Secretary of our Seoul Archdiocesan Tribunal seemed frightened as she ushered a big U.S. Army Sergeant into my office. "Good morning, Father. Our Chaplain sent me to see about my marriage. I was married in the Church and divorced some years ago. Now I'm remarried out of the Church. The Chaplain said I should see you to get straightened out. I don't really give a damn about this religious stuff. But the Chaplain is a good Joe and I don't want to hurt his feelings. I thought I'd humor him."
I sighed, and thought of the hours of work it would take to process this man's case. And this for a belligerent bore who didn't "give a damn".
I felt anger rising within me, but I was too tired to throw him out. I took him through the questionnaires and obtained the other documents necessary. It turned out the Tribunal was able to grant him a declaration of nullity for the first marriage.
He returned to the Tribunal as belligerently as the first time, even refusing to sit down. I told him that the tribunal granted a declaration of nullity for his first marriage and he will be free to marry his present wife in the Church.
The big man looked at me; his face showed complete astonishment. He sat down. Tears flowed down his cheeks and he began to cry. When he regained control, he said quietly: "Father, this is going to be a very Happy Easter. My wife and I haven't been able to receive the sacraments for twelve years."
I wondered, "How many hurting people hide their hurt with a 'I don't give a damn?'"
