Family is the place where we receive affirmation for our emotional needs, become acquainted with love, and establish our identity. We all want to live well and have good relations with others, this all begins in the family. These are the first words of an article in the Kyeongyang magazine by a specialist on family matters, who goes on to show us the ever-present dangers of addiction.
Do the families answer our needs? Industrialization, inundated with information, nurtured with ultra individualism, and in a rat race: we are overcome with stress, and sickness is becoming more frequent. Family, is where we should be regenerated; however, instead find stress and bickering.
In attempting to rid ourselves of stress, we search for pleasure, when it comes, we repeat it, and from habit, it becomes an addiction. We no longer have control, and we are under its control and lose ourselves; the false-self takes over. He uses the work of Dr.Murray Bowen, psychiatrist, and shows how this relates to addiction. The objects of addiction (dependence): smart phone, Internet games, pornography, liquor, tobacco, television, coffee, food, drugs, shopping, stock market, gambling, work, sports, cosmetic surgery, dissipation, sex, religion, people, and the like, these are only some of the many different types of addiction.
When a person loses his sense of worth and value for life, anger is expressed towards others and oneself. Addiction can do great damage to family and health. When one has an addiction one is not able to control it alone, but a greater difficulty is the failure to understand that they are addicted. They feel they can stop when they want, and have all kinds of justifications for their actions. The co-dependence of family and others on the one addicted is always present, and the one addicted becomes less in control, feels guilty and shame and can't resist the anger.
To become free of addiction one needs to change the way one sees the problem. The object of the addiction is no help, and has to be seen as the problem. This has to be accepted with the head and heart.
He wants us to examine ourselves on the possibility of addiction. Once we realize the problem we are on the road to recovery. The place of the family he concludes is extremely important. There are many families were the children are not respected and trusted, and are controlled with pressure, which is sad. The family should be the cradle for life and love, a place for rest and peace, a place to be renewed.
Each person in the family is important. One person who has this real-self and lives the sensible healthy life, the energy will overflow, and the joy of the Lord, will spread to the rest of the family.