Increasingly, crimes in recent
years are the kind we don't like to talk about, but a psychologist has
recently done just that in the Bible & Life magazine. He discusses what he believes is involved in these horrible, indiscriminate killings.
Traditionally,
crimes of anger have been understood as the result of a personal
grudge against another, with the intention of keeping the crime as
private as possible. However, the crimes the writer brings to our
attention are the kind that the perpetrator wants everyone to know
about. Since the victims are randomly chosen and the motivation is not
clear, it creates a climate of fear throughout society. Those who have
studied these cases believe these crimes are motivated by a deep-seated
anger directed toward society and the world in general.
Why
do some people have so much hate? According to the psychologist, it's
because of the recurrent failure and frustration they have experienced
in life, perhaps stemming from the importance placed on winning in our
competitive society. And it does not involve achieving any one
particular goal; winning in whatever competition one is in, it is
believed, will determine whether we succeed or fail in life. We also
fear to lose because of the embarrassment of not measuring up to
expectations, our own and that of others, knowing that everyone close to
them will know, and that their chances of having a successful career
will be diminished.
He
tells us that on average, 210 students drop out of school daily, and 41
kill themselves every day. An obvious sign, he says, that something is
wrong in society and that steps need to be taken to correct the
situation. The way to do this is not going to be easy, and may not be
acceptable to those who have the ability to adapt to this unhealthy
system. But to label as losers those who can't adapt, he says, is not
the proper way of seeing the problem.
Those
who are able to adapt to
the system we have created are not necessarily the healthy ones, nor
are those who have problems with what we have created necessarily the
unhealthy ones. Rather, all should not only strive for good
scores but enjoy the pursuit of learning, focusing on the process
more than the results of the competition.
In
every competitive society there are the so-called winners and losers.
Though winners are on top of the competitive ladder, and the losers at
the bottom, they do have something
in common: both have their eyes on what others are doing to succeed, and
on societal expectations. Winning, one feels
superior; losing, the other feels inferior. But both fail to understand
the nature of true happiness.
The
anger that many feel, if not addressed by society, has the possibility
of finding an outlet in ways that are not healthy. The situation is not
easily dealt with since many often do not know the reason for their
explosive anger, which has slowly built up over the years. And the
reason for this, the psychologist says, is that they have accepted the
rules of a dysfunctional game. They are not conscious that they have accepted these so-called
rules of life. This perception of reality, received from parents,
school, the media, and friends, these rules have become part of who they
think they are. Who is responsible for this kind of thinking,
unknowingly accepted by many? All of us.