Who am I?

This reflection is taken from In His Own Words by Fr. John Cioppa, Maryknoller from Hong Kong. Fr. John just recently celebrated his 5oth anniversary as a priest and during that time has had many positions of leadership in the Society and at present is the superior of the Maryknollers in Hong Kong.

" Fr. John joined the Holy Spirit Study Centre in 1988, and since then has become the indispensable administrator, who helps us to run the often-complex daily operations of the Centre. He has done this with tireless devotion, with charm and respect, gaining from the members of the Centre our most sincere affection and gratitude. Fr. John is not only a straightforward and efficient administrator, but also a man who loves beauty and grace. He was behind the renovation of the facilities and offices of the Centre, giving us a nice, well-lit and pleasant place to work everyday. Father John has also been the capable convener of past Church in China conferences. He really deserves our gratitude. "

There are two questions which you and I never cease to ask. Questions that remain buried deep in the heart of every person. One is "Who AM I?"and the other is, "What AM I doing Here?" We may never ask these questions directly of anyone, but in one way or another we are constantly seeking for answers and the answers are what gives meaning to my life.These are living questions; puzzles that are never solved, mysteries that are never dispelled.

The first answer we often come up with is "I am what I do". And this is very real. When I do things and have a little success, I feel good about myself. When I fail or get older and can do little, I feel low or depressed and useless. Young people who have still to begin their careers also feel they have done nothing and likewise get low or depressed. So often our identity depends on what I can do.

We might also say, "I am what other people say about me. "For some people this is most important. When people speak well of me. I can walk around happily and freely. When people start saying negative things about me I begin to feel sad. If I do something well and 10 people congratulate me , but one scorns me, I remember the latter because I have been hurt. If someone says something hurtful in the morning, it can stay with me the whole day and ruin my mood for the day. What people say about me has an enormous affect on who I think I am.

Some might say, "I am what I have." For example, I can say I am Chinese, with kind parents, a university education, good job and healthy. I feel happy and satisfied with myself, but as soon as I lose any part of what I have: my health or job, for instance, I begin to slip into darkness. This happens often with people who have great material possessions: wealth, property, and money. Many people committed suicide in 1929 when the Stock Market crashed.

Quite often a lot of our energy goes into " I am what I do," "I am what others say about me," "I am what I have." When people live that way our lives are repetition of ups and downs. When people speak well of me, when I am successful, when I have a lot, I am excited and happy. But when I fail, and people talk about me behind my back or I lose my friends I slip into depression and am in low spirits.

When Jesus was tempted in the desert, the devil tried to get Jesus to do great things so that people would be convinced of "Who He was." But Jesus already knew who He was. At His baptism by John He already heard His heavenly Father assure Him, "You are my beloved son in whom I am well pleased." That was Jesus' true identity. He didn't have to depend on what He could do , or what people would say or what He possessed. Jesus knew very well that He was the beloved son of the Father.

And that is our true identity also. What we say about Jesus can be said of us. We too are the beloved children of God. He loves us just as much as He loved Jesus. That's what it means to have faith; not to know a lot, but to be truly convinced that God really does love me as His son or daughter with an unconditional, unlimited forgiving love. So when I fail, or am ill, or am bankrupt, or am out of a job, or grow old, or am rejected or hurt, I am not overcome, because I know "Who I Am"- a beloved child of God.

What Fr. John has seen over the years working in Hong Kong is something we also see in Korea. We at times think that we are here only to work and to possess. If this does become the end and be all of our existence, disappointments and frustrations will not be far away. Life is a gift of God and it is to be enjoyed but often we use God and do not enjoy Him and what He has given. Koreans do love to play, to enjoy one another, and be close to nature but with "progress" time becomes money and the simple things of life no longer are important. We are too busy to enjoy just "being", our existence, a situation which is a colossal tragedy.

The Unhealed Scars of the Korean Psyche

While in the States recently I visited the American Museum of Natural History in New York City. I was interested in things Korean so I spent some time in the Asian area of the museum. I was upset and had an inkling of what the Koreans understand by "Han".(원한)

In the Asian area there was only one section in which I found a representation of Korean Life. I went over to the Japanese section and found many more but the placard that I found annoying was the one that said many things came into Japan from Asia. I have forgotten the exact words but it must have been difficult for those writing to mention that it came in from Korea. There is nothing in history about Japan before 57 AD and it is my understanding that it was the Koreans that transformed the Japanese stone- age culture into a agricultural and metal one. If this be the facts, it is no surprise to see that Japan is one of the reasons for the Korean "Han". Not only do Koreans have this "Han" feeling for I also found it difficult to shake. The history of Korea is older than that of Japan and much of what the Japanese have received did come in from China but by way of Korea. This is difficult for the Japanese to accept.

The dictionary definition of Han is: a grudge; resentment; a bitter feeling; spite; hatred; rancor; a mixed feeling of sorrow and regret (unique to Korean); an unsatisfied desire.

It is a scar that is never really healed. The Koreans have suffered a great deal over the centuries at the hands of others. A small country surrounded by three giants and in recent history the United States is included. Korea has been a pawn for others over the centuries to meet their individual needs. This article does give one a general understanding of "Han".

North Korea and "Han" would be a good place to understand the antics of this part of the peninsular. They have many unhealed scars. If this is true of the South we can say that this is felt in the North many times over. Especially now that they are having difficulty feeding their own people and demonized in the world press.

The Catholic Church with many years of persecution in their beginning history in Korea has also been scared and has worked to rid itself of this feeling of "Han".
The "Han" has been sublimated.

Jesus was very clear what has to be done with the "Han" feeling. "if you bring your gift to the altar and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift at the altar , go first to be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift. "
Mt (5:23)

EATING AS PRAYER

Taken from In My Own Words by Fr. John Cioppa of Hong Kong.

Have you ever thought of eating as prayer? If prayer is communicating with God, we can pray anytime whether we are walking, reading, working or eating. St. Theresa said, "God walks amid the pots and pans." God is everywhere: in our kitchens, dining rooms, classrooms as well as in our churches. God is 100% available to us, whether we are kneeling in prayer, doing dishes or doing nothing.

In the New Testament, much of Jesus' life and ministry was associated with food. His first miracle was at a marriage feast. He multiplied bread and fish to satisfy people's hunger. He ate at Zachary, the tax collector's house in Jericho, and with lepers in Bethany. It was at a meal that Mary Magdalene poured ointment over Jesus' feet. At the Last Supper Jesus chose bread and wine as the elements under which He would remain with us after His Resurrection. After He rose from the dead He appeared several times to the Apostles at meals-on the road to Emmaus and on the seashore.

God in His great wisdom created our bodies, which normally have to be fed several times a day. If we don't eat, in a short time we die. Eating does not only nourish the body, it also provides an occasion for people to stop and rest for a few moments, and gives the opportunity for conversation and sharing of life. Apart from the body, eating nourishes the soul as well. The way we eat says a lot about the way we live. We often assess the quality of daily life by the way the family eats. What a beautiful sight it is to see a family sitting down together to eat, talk , laugh and maybe even cry! Some of my fondest childhood memories are of the entire family gathering together for Sunday dinner. There was plenty of good food, wine and conversation and lots of time to enjoy it. Sometimes the dinner lasted for three hours.

Unfortunately the custom of the entire family eating is slowly eroding away. The reasons are many. Time is limited , work schedules are varied, houses are small and cramped, fast food restaurants are many and the pressures of society are great.

... What better way to celebrate birthdays, weddings or even funerals than by having a meal together. With food we settle arguments, restore lost friendships, settle business deals or dispel hurt feelings . When we eat we commune not only with people but also with God.The feeling of well being after a good meal, the satisfaction after a cool glass of water or the joy of a glass of wine is all expressions of prayer. They are different ways that God reveals Himself. The peace and joy that I feel after a meal with a friend, the relief I share after solving a problem and make friends again, the handshake with friends after a banquet, the enjoyment of good food or drink are signs that God is with us. We don't always have to use words to pray. We just have to be aware that all of these creatures come from God had have been give to us to use, enjoy and share with others.We should thank God but even if we do not, God is glorified. God made us to enjoy food and made food for us to enjoy.

This reflection makes a great deal of sense in our own Korean Society. The Korean have a great table culture and it is one that I have admired from the first days I arrived in Korea. When we have a meal at the mission station with the community there is always a place for some one who comes late. All that is necessary is to give him eating utensils and a bowl of rice which is always available and he can sit down at the table with the many side dishes. It is a very welcoming table and quite different from the eating in the west.With the men it can develop into a drinking finale which is not part of the table culture that I find most attractive.

Why I Respect Cardinal Kim

Fr. Oh Kyong-hwan a priest of the diocese has an interesting article in our Sunday Bulletin this week. He was a professor in the Seoul Seminary and had the opportunity of meeting the Cardinal often. He not only heard him speak, talked with him, and saw him in action during those years he was able to hear comments about him from others. He feels that the church and society were blessed with his presence as the bishop of Seoul. From the beginning of the 1970s to the beginning of the 90s it was a dark time in Korea. The basic rights of free speech and the media were repressed and those who had difficulty with the state of things were arrested and at times tortured.

During that time the Cardinal reacted, as the ordinary of Seoul, in a very proper way. He was able to do what the times were asking of him and responded appropriately: when all in 1971 were afraid and silent. During the sermon at the midnight Mass that was televised nation wide, he criticized the totalitarian rule of Park Cheong- hee. He became the protector of freedom, democracy and human rights. His was a prophetic stance, the supporter for human rights, but never in the extreme.

In 1987 June 10th at the end of a demonstration denouncing the government by college students, they went to the cathedral. The Cardinal's tone was determined, he told those sent to arrest the students they would have to walk over him, the priests and the sisters to get to the students. This put an end to the attempt.

The Cardinal did not worry on what to do and what to say. He was able to judge what the government was going to do but the big concern was a small group within the Church that were in opposition and criticizing what he was doing. They also began a campaign to remove him from his position by circulating a petition asking for signatures of those that disagreed with his actions. A group of young priests took to the streets to demonstrate against the government. Those who were for and against continued but he never refused the priests from using the Cathedral for prayer meetings against the government.

During this time Fr. Oh was teaching the seminarians what the Church's message was in social teaching. The foundation of this social teaching is: with our intellects, freedom of the will and consciences we are made in the image of God and have dignity. That dignity should never be violated.

The Cardinal always followed the teachings of the Church. Fr. Oh concluded the article saying it was a blessing that he was the ordinary of the diocese. Someone else in that position who was in opposition to what he did, would have given us a very shameful history to deal with and there would have been a delay in democratization of the Country.

5000th KOREAN PRIEST

Today is the Feast Day of Father Andrew (Taegon) Kim, the first Korean Priest. On June 26, 2009 at the Olympic Stadium, we had the ordination of the 5oooth Korean Priest. The first Korean Priest was ordained on 1845 the 5000th was ordained for the Archdiocese of Seoul at
the ordination ceremony at Olympic Stadium where 27 priests started their new life.

Pope Benedict XVI has declared a “Year for Priests” beginning with the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus on June 19, 2009. The year will conclude in Rome with an international gathering of priests with the Holy Father on June 19, 2010. the Pope has declared St. John Vianney the Universal Patron of Priests on the occasion of the 150th anniversary of the death of the Curé d’Ars.

At the celebration of ordination to the Ministerial Priesthood, Cardinal Cheong said, "As of the year 1961 when I was ordained a priest, there were less than 250 Korean Priests. However, today we have a pleasure to see the birth of the 5000th Korean Priest here in this place."

Whenever we select a group for special attention there are reasons. The problems that priests can have in our modern society are many. The editorial in the Catholic Peace Paper this week mentions that for a priest to live as he should in our society demands that he overcome many obstacles. If one is not alert it is easy to live the comfortable life, there are just too many areas of contamination.

The Korean Priests have their older brother priest St. Kim Andrew and St. John Mary Vianney, parish priest patron, to help them in their priestly life. The life of our priests depends on the prayers and life of our Catholics; that is not overstating the case. It is said the Catholics get the priests they deserve. Priests come from the modern society in which they live and it is not easy to overcome the temptations that are prevalent in that society. Priests do influence the
Catholics but I wonder if the Catholics' influence on the priest is not greater.

Why Some Leave the Church

Fr. John Cioppa a Maryknoller working in Hong Kong reflected on the reasons people enter, stay and leave the Church in Hong Kong. I found it interesting and not much different from the reasons that the Koreans might suggest for doing the same. We will consider Fr. John's understanding of why they leave.

The Catholic Church in Korea has had a spectacular growth. From a very small Church to 10% of the population at the present. We also see a large number of these baptized, not practicing, shortly after entering the Church. The former President Noh Moo-hyun would be a good example of this . How much does this have to do with catechizing and how much from the motivation of the individual is an interesting question?

Fr. John mentions a survey that was done a few years ago on newly baptized Catholics:

they found that 10.4% lose their faith and became alienated from God in the first year after Baptism, and 19.5% seldom or no longer attended Sunday Mass. That is a good reminder that those who develop the habit of going to Mass during their catechumenate period are more likely to continue doing so after being baptized. Falling away can be a conscious decision. Some leave because they disagree with the Church's policy or the local Bishop or parish priest. Others do so because they feel hurt or neglected by the parish leader. Some leave because they don't feel welcomed by the local Catholics. Some are angry with God because of an unanswered prayer, or for some other reason. Those who violate Church laws or have done something which they think cannot be forgiven, feel it's hypocritical to remain in the Church. Falling away can also be an unconscious decision. Some people gradually become distracted by work, money or power. Those who are no longer around friends and family who have been their spiritual support often stop going to church. This can happen when a Catechumenate class is finished and there are no more meetings or when people move away from their parish church. In my experience the vast majority do not fall away . They were never fully in the Church. They may have been baptized as infants but have had no opportunity for Christan formation. Perhaps their parents were new Catholics and didn't have an adequate understanding or appreciation of the faith themselves. When these youngsters reach adulthood , they often don't admit they are Catholics. Of course, they don't get married in a church nor have their children baptized. When sickness or old age comes, however, they may return for the Sacrament and a Catholic funeral. For them the flame flickered but didn't go out.

It is my conviction that religion is not taught but caught. It is something that has to be experienced over a long period of time in order to have a lasting effect. John A Cioppa M.M. "IN HIS OWN WORDS"

Otto Who?

This was written by Fr. Roman Theisen in 1989 . Fr. Roman died in 2002, at Maryknoll Center. He was diagnosed with Parkinson's many years before and continued to work as pastor, Regional Superior and as chaplain at the Samsung Medical Center in Seoul. His desire was to die in Korea but it was not to be. His condition deteriorated and had to return to the Center to get the necessary medical help. He died shortly after but not experiencing the "Roman who?" of this blog.

Some where in the Maryknoll world a priest or brother had died. The Rector went to the altar and read a brief telegram: "Word has just arrived at Maryknoll that father Otto Rauschenback was killed yesterday by Chinese bandits. details will be made known as they are received." There was a sudden silence, and then whispers were heard: "Otto who?" Even the Rector seemed embarrassed at not knowing who this priest was, whose tragic death had just been announced. It impressed me then, and still does, that here was a Maryknoll Missioner who'd been ordained at Maryknoll for the foreign missions, sent to China, stayed there, and was largely forgotten. He became to me an instant hero.

Details later informed us that Otto "Rauschenbach had gone to China twenty-one years before. He returned to the U.S. for a home visit after ten years in China. He went back and ten years later was planning another visit home when Japanese armies invaded China. Fearing he might not be allowed to return if he left, he moved into a mountainous area behind the Japanese lines and continued to minister to his Chinese people. In the unsettled area between the warring armies he fell into the hands of bandits, who killed him and left his body lying in a ditch.

Maryknoll has a Departure Ceremony for young priests, brothers, and lay missioners. Friends and relatives surround them, wishing them god-speed and success in their first mission. It is, indeed, a heart warming occasion... however I have been impressed, by the quiet men who arrive alone after years on their mission. They arrive by taxi, often having had no one meet them at the airport.Their eyes light up if they recognize a classmate or someone they know. Otherwise, they follow the official guest master to their assigned room. They stay awhile for medical care at the end of which they call a taxi, murmur farewell to a classmate or someone they know, and then they are gone. quietly returning to people they love.

The greatest honor I can imagine is for the Lord to allow me also to remain quietly with my own people in Korea, until the day a telegram is sent from Maryknoll announcing: "Father Roman Theisen has died in Korea," and in distant places young Maryknollers look at each other in puzzlement: "Roman who?"