Are You Happy?

"Are you happy now?" The writer begins her article in the Seoul Diocesan Bulletin with  these words. Surfing on the Internet, these words in English perked her curiosity. It was a lead-in to an advertisement for a diet plan, claiming that fat people can't be happy. The diet promised that its diet will not only help users to lose over 5 kilos, but help them regain happiness. Isn't this preposterous? she asks. That you can't be happy if your fat?

The reason the writer was so agitated was that she recently saw a TV program whose theme was happiness. Over 40 percent of Koreans, when asked what was the number one condition for happiness, said it was money. The program mentioned that earning up to 4,000 dollars a month would cause the happiness index to go up. Earning more than that and there are problems. Spending additional time making money often disrupts family life and relationships with friends.  

It seems that happiness, she quips, has an expiration date. Is there no long-lasting happiness here on earth?  she asks. The writer believes there is. But it's not the happiness you want to show off to others. It's the happiness she wants for herself. Daily, she gathers and puts together, she says, the small moments of happiness in her life.

To the ad's question, "Are you happy now?" she does not hesitate to answer 'yes'.  Not because she is not fat but because of those moments of happiness, such as her daily warm cup of coffee and milk first thing in the morning, as she gradually becomes wide awake and in action mode. She has been in the habit of doing this from her early twenties, when she was mountain climbing, and has been doing this for over 30 years.

Another moment of happiness takes place in the evening. Before going to  bed, she writes in her diary, has a glass of wine, which the doctor recommended for improving blood circulation, and listens to music. It's the time she uses to look over the events of the day, and to enjoy a relaxed feeling of satisfaction for a day well-spent.

The third thing she does is to read poetry out loud. She has a habit of speaking fast so she began to do this from the time she was in high school in the hope of slowing down her speech. She reads the poems carefully with a loud voice. This has allowed her to memorize a number of the poems, and has been helpful in selecting words which she uses in her writing. She would like us all to find out how many of these small birds of happiness we currently have in our own hands but have not yet allowed them to spread their wings and fly.

Today is the feast of Pentecost and the day on which we remember to give thanks for the knowledge of the gift of the Spirit. We have a Comforter internal to ourselves that is not influenced by what is external to us.  We are temples of the Holy Spirit. This gift of gifts allows us to be open to the many  joys of our lives, once we rid ourselves of our self-imposed obstacles.

Need for Saints

Catholic Statistics for the year 2012 have recently been published. The number of Catholics remains steady at 10 percent; the number of priests has significantly increased and the number of male and female religious has increased slightly, but the devotion of our Catholics continues to weaken.

There are currently one Cardinal, 34 bishops, 4578 Korean priests and 176 foreign priests. 54.3 percent of the priests are in parish work; the number of priests working overseas has increased by 19 percent from last year. The number entering the seminary has decreased by 9 percent from the previous year, which is an alarming trend.  The number entering male religious orders has decreased by about the same (9.3 percent), and the number of women entering female religious orders has decreased by 44.4 percent, an ominous sign of what the future will be like.

10.3 percent of the population are Catholic, though the numbers entering the Church has decreased by 1.8 percent from the previous year there still is an increase in the total number of Catholics, but those going to Mass are decreasing. The Seoul diocese has the largest percentage of Catholics with 13.8 percent.

The Catholic Times editorial found the statistics on the present state of sacramental life of our Christians a serious matter of concern. The numbers attending Sunday Mass and going to confession is a good index of the spiritual life of our Catholics. Statistics comparing this year with last year have shown Mass attendance down 1 percent, and the number of confessions down 4.6 percent. These two sacraments of the Eucharist and Confession are a barometer of the life of our Christians, and of the relationship we have with the church community.

Attendance at Mass is not only a sign that one is serious about their faith life, it goes beyond that; it is the essence of what it means to be a Catholic. And Confession is the way we continually renew our faith life and prepare to be more zealous; it also tends to have an immediate effect on the faith life of the community. The editorial points out that when this is missing, it's no exaggeration to say that a mature faith is also missing.

This is not something new but has been the case since 1990, and has been noted repeatedly. Efforts have been made to turn this around but little has improved. Programs that have been established are usually attended by those who are already zealous in their faith life, and not by those who would benefit the most from them.

During this Year of Faith, efforts are continually made to stop the trend that is emptying the pews. What is happening in the West is beginning to appear also here in the East. Programs, retreats, talks, better sermons, a more meaningful liturgy, a more sensitive clergy and many other possible solutions will not stop the erosion of faith that is taking place until the life of Christians becomes less influenced by the values of a materialistic society and more influenced by the example of Jesus. Simply put: we need more saints.

A priest, newly assigned to head the JOC (Jeunesse Ouvrière Chriétienne, Young Christian Workers) writes in a bulletin for priests that he went to a Maryknoll priest who held the position before him, Fr. Michael Bransfield, for advice in taking on his new work. The priest relates that Fr. Michael, who died in 1989, came from wealth but in his work in Korea he lived simply and always saw the world with the eyes of a worker.

The writer reminds us that living with workers and hearing what they have to say changes the way you see the world, and there were, in fact, many changes in Fr. Bransfield's life.  If we are to know how truth and justice functions in the world, he believed we needed to see the world from the perspective of the marginalized and the suffering. He has left many words and pictures showing us the hardships that are endured daily by those having to live such a life. 

When the writer went to Fr. Bransfield for advice on how best to interact with the workers in his charge, he said Fr. Bransfield took a few moments to think about what to say and then responded with two suggestions: speak little and listen long; secondly, work with them. The priest writer said he didn't always follow the recommendations, but they have registered with him and never left, and in time he came to realize they were the words of the Gospel.

He describes, in his article, a worker in his sixties, who lived a life of poverty, never married, and was generally not recognized by others. He became interested in the Church, began to study, and was baptized. One day he was seen walking back and forth in an alley by one of the Catholics, his face expressing great joy, which was not his usual manner. The woman asked what made  him so happy. He had a  meeting with a priest, he answered, and told him about his life. "You have done well, you have had much trouble and  have overcome many difficulties," said the priest. This is what made him happy, he told the woman.

Those who have much and are respected by society often are the ones who monopolize the words of the mouth and what is eaten. The poor often do not have the same opportunities, having to be content to say little and eat little. 

Jesus often went to the alienated of society to speak and eat with them, and to listen to what they had to say. We know that he opened the lips of many who couldn't talk. Those who were alienated and were overcome with a feeling of inferiority were liberated with the love that was shown.

The Mass, with its many different meanings, is also primarily a sign of that love which is shared by all. We daily share Jesus' words and the 'bread', as did the first Christians when they shared their experience of the faith and what they possessed. It was their answer to solving the problems of the marginalized and those who suffer.

Attraction For the Free Gift

A religious order priest was recently embarrassed by an incident in his life, and so upset at what he felt it said about him that it became the subject of his Catholic Times column on spirituality.  Admiring Pope Francis for his simplicity of life and love of St. Francis, and his own religious call to  poverty, he remembered vividly straying from this intention.

One day while he was on the way to the barbers, two young men standing outside a van by the side of the road called out that they were giving free rice noodles at a near-by building. Always attracted to what was free, he said he could not let this opportunity pass. Since he had time to spare, off he went to the building, where there were others waiting for the gift. However, it was not a quick and done deal. The men gave those waiting a black plastic bag, containing about 10 tora seeds, and spoke of how good it was for the eyes. Impatient for the rice noodles, he wondered when the free gift would be handed out. But they brought out another black bag, and began explaining  the health benefits of ginseng.
 

It soon became evident what the men were up to. They were marketers, he said, publicizing the benefits of red ginseng from Korea, touting its superiority over Chinese ginseng. But he was not interested; all he wanted was the free rice noodles. Many of the others, realizing what was happening, quietly left but he remained, intent on getting his gift. And then another black bag was passed around, containing a bar of soap made with rice. Finally, a well-dressed man took over and tried to sell the Korean red ginseng at a reduced price.

He did finally receive the bag of rice noodles, the priest said, but he felt deceived, though leaving the scene with the four or five black bags, headed for the barber shop and then returned to the monastery. On reflection, he realized that the free rice noodles were not free. He said that his hope to get something for nothing had led to his wasting three hours of his time. It was a surprise to him, he said, that despite his resolve to abide by Pope Francis' example, simply hearing the word 'free' was enough to change this intention.

That evening he had a late evening rice noodles snack, tora tea, washed his face with the rice soap, and went to bed. The habit of spiritual poverty made him use well what he had received. But at the same time he resolved to act differently in the future.
                           

Service in Love for 33 Years

"It is with the heart that you learn what love is and not with the head," says Dr. Kang, an 82-year-old dentist who for 33 years treated without charge the dental needs of patients suffering from Hansen's disease. The interview on the occasion of his retirement, carried by both Catholic papers, noted that he had been given a plaque in gratitude for his many years of unheralded service to the Hansen Disease community. His  free service extended to over 15 thousand patients. In receiving the plaque, he quoted the words of Cardinal Stephen Kim: It took him 70 years for love to go from the head to the heart. The doctor knows of what the Cardinal speaks, although humbly saying he only knows what is meant in a superficial way.

Those he has  served over the years arranged the presentation with a party in his office. His hearing loss and age made it necessary to stop his dental treatments, begun in 1979, in the different Hansen settlements throughout the country. He would leave his own practice and travel without receiving help from other groups or organizations. He also would take the molds necessary and make the dentures himself, not needing a dental technician, saving a great deal of money. He did charge for the materials used and would donate the money to the groups working with Hansen patients.

Emma Freisinger, an Austrian nurse who has worked with Hansen patients for over 50 years, was hoping to have a doctor who would take care of the dental needs of her patients, and when Dr. Kang appeared it was too good for words, she said. Patient's with Hansen's disease (once known as leprosy) even if cured would have difficulty being accepted back into society. They would have difficulty not only going to a clinic or hospital, but riding a bus, going to a restaurant or finding a place to sleep. It is easy to see why Dr. Kang's services were enthusiastically received.

Over the years, because of the doctor's work among the forgotten ones of society, he has been asked for interviews by newspapers but has always refused--until his retirement this year. He hopes that others will be open to this kind of service to the poor and sick of our society.

In the early days of his service to the Hansen patients he kept it a secret even from his family, knowing they would be opposed. But in time his wife and family were very supportive of his  volunteer work. He is also well-known in Seoul for the dental help given priests and seminarians over the years at his clinic, all gratis.

A volunteer working with Hansen patients said that what Dr. Kang did for over thirty years means he must have been doing it with a joyful heart, otherwise it would never have lasted that long. There is a need for this kind of service in society, and thankfully, we do have it. Dr. Kang is an example to the  younger generation of what it means to find a place in their own life for this kind of service to others

Preciousness of Family

May is the month of the family. When we say family, says the desk columnist of the Catholic Times, thoughts of joy and hope should come to mind. Instead, we are more likely to think of conflict between husband and wife, children disobeying parents, parents abusing children--the traditional family closeness is disappearing.

The integrity of the modern family is faced with threatening influences, he says, that did not exist in the past. Fierce competition for college entrance that worries not only the aspiring student but the whole family; the confusion of values that comes with excessive competition obscures the direction of life, putting us on a materialist treadmill; unnecessarily costly weddings are breaking up the family way of life, which leads to the one-child syndrome.

Society with its materialist values, its focus on physical rather than spiritual realities, tends to create an unhealthy model for families to emulate, such as working hard to build a beautiful house and neglecting to build a home. There is, of course, no problem in living well when one does not have a nice house. It may be uncomfortable when the house is a problem, but without a loving family, the problem can become a tragedy. And one of the tragedies of an unhealthy family is that it often gives rise to the delinquency of the young.

This is one of the worries and problems of our families today. When the family goes astray everything is out of balance. The family is like a barricade, says the columnist, that keeps the flood waters out. This is something we all know, he says, but we don't find it easy to put into practice. One way is for each member of the family to respect each other; without this caring for each other, the family itself cannot be respected. The husband needs to respect the wife, the wife the husband, the parents the children, the children the parents. It is, he says, the first order of business.

All of us should ask ourselves how much of the problems of modern families do we acknowledge and empathize with. The columnist does not give himself high marks on this score. The reasons for family problems are many, from financial worries to personal discord, but they all originate, he says, in a lack of oneness as family. He uses an analogy to illustrate this point: When flying a kite, if the string is strong no matter how strong the wind blows there is no problem. The journalist considers the string our faith life. With this belief in God, the family will be able to overcome the difficulties they encounter. This is our call, he says, and he wants us to reflect on this call during this month of May.

The Plus and Minus of the Social Network

A person in a crowd does not shoulder any personal responsibility. A truism amply illustrated in the scriptures: "There was a lot of talk about him [Jesus] among the people." Some said, "He's a good man," but others replied, "No, he's misleading the people" (John 7:12). A little later, with one voice, the crowd shouted, "Take him away! Crucify him!" (John 19:15).

Who makes up a crowd? And what voice do you and I have in a crowd? A religious sister who studied media ecology, and spirituality reminds us, in her article in the Kyeongyang Magazine, of a few important points when using the social networking services (SNS).

It is easy to overlook the fact that a few people when aligned together can become the voice of a crowd without the  approval of many in the crowd. People who have come together in such a crowd are anonymous. In much the same way the social networks are following the rules of mass psychology, those with the same interests often coming together to make their own group, where they find and enjoy security.

Teenagers are beginning to use in their conversations the word "KakaoStory bullying." (KakaoStory is a Korean photo sharing social networking service.) It's a form of bullying in which a person is invited to a cyberspace room and, with pictures, is attacked in a way that exceeds the worst of the 'word only' type of bullying. This kind of bullying lasts 24 hours a day, and you can't hide from it.

A boy who was participating in this kind of bullying was asked why he was using abusive language. He said, unperturbed by what he had been doing, that it was bullying, simply bullying. Doesn't that bother you in any way? he was asked. No, was his unemotional and matter-of-fact answer. We also find this unemotional involvement, she says, in other age groups and in other segments of society who are using the same bullying tactics with malicious comments that are often seen on posts.

We all have a desire to relate with others, and to be ostracized hurts. The possibilities that are offered by the SNS are numerous. The sister feels that the personal values one has are weakened by these services, as we gradually are influenced by the values of others participating in the service, and to want to imitate the perceived 'stars' of the SNS, and when we are not able to do so, the sister says, it can lead susceptible individuals into depression.

There is a limit to the number of friends we can have, and those made on SNS, we know, can be easily forgotten. A true friend is one we can meet with at any time, a person we can easily ask for help and support. We have to practice this type of meeting, the sister says, and come out of the crowd, meeting on a one-on-one basis. We are not sufficiently consoled merely by words in cyberspace. We need the presence of the other.

Referencing Peter 3:10: "Keep his tongue from evil and his lips from uttering deceit," she hopes that we can elevate the social media from being a place where one frequently feels no sense of responsibility for what one says, to a place where joy is experienced.

She quotes a professor who cites studies that found that happy people have surrounded themselves with happy people, and unhappy people are surrounded by unhappy people. She hopes that SNS members will foster a desire to support each networking member, so that ultimately we will build a network of joy that will be truly social, because, she says, like all good things in life, social networking is a blessing and a gift of God.