Elimination of Fatherhood

 

An article in the Kyeongyang magazine by a priest professor in life issues of a Catholic University deals with the need for fathers in society, the development of science, and the possibilities available in society.

Recently a woman celebrity received an anonymous sperm donation and choosing artificial insemination gave birth to a son. Picked up by the press, journalists made much of the absence of the father in the process. 

The sexual relationship of male and female is not necessary for raising a family. With the means of assisted reproduction available, no need for the sexual act, and women can go it alone. The absence of the man, is it not all for the better? This is the question that has been raised.

This is one of the crises for fatherhood appearing in society. Hanna Rosin is the book The End of Man brings it to the attention of many. 

Pope Francis has also mentioned this crisis of Fathers in the Exhortation Joy of Love #176: "We often hear that ours is a society without fathers. In Western culture, the father figure is said to be symbolically absent, missing, or vanished. Manhood itself seems to be called into question. The result has been an understandable confusion."

The crisis of fatherhood does not mean that the role of the mother has become larger or that we now are dealing with matriarchy. Modern society is eliminating fatherhood. Freeing oneself from the violent, the authoritative, the oppressive father, and in the process fatherhood.

 

However, in ridding the father from the family they are eliminating God from their thinking and are heading for shipwreck. This is a problem facing society. True subjectivity no longer exists for the individual who has lost direction. Every internal impulse and instinct will be influenced by external circumstances and changes moving one every which way.

With the elimination of fatherhood, the foundation of the personality nurtured in the family is being dismantled. With the destruction of fatherhood, motherhood will not be complete. In the reference at the beginning of the article to the unmarried woman who chooses to have in 'vitro' fertilization with an unknown father is denying the place of the father, subordinated to science, the image of family changes. 

This can be confirmed by the fact that the recent case of controversy over fatherhood mentioned earlier is closely related to IVF, one of the risks to human life. IVF technology separates the link between sex and childbirth, raising questions about the role of men and fathers. It also separates the precious birth of human beings from the context of marital love, hurting their children's rights.

After all, protecting and cultivating fatherhood is closely related to recognizing the fundamental value of human life and understanding how rapidly developing technologies of life apply to humans and what such technology means.

The most urgent thing in this situation is life education. According to a survey conducted by the Korean Catholic Council in 2014, Catholics' perceptions of life and non-believers' perceptions of life are not much different. It is also true that there is a lack of life education in the Catholic Church in Korea. 

The rest of the article goes on to show the ways the Church in Korea is working to improve the education of the believers on Life Issues. He looks at some efforts in the local church on fatherhood, home, and livelihood and proposes directions for the future.

Concience in the Life of a Believer

 

 In Light of the World Column of the Catholic Times we have some thoughts on conscience. Something  we should never compromise no matter how difficult, angry, ignored, our pride hurting. That is what conscience is all about. How far have we gone to protect conscience?

Tolstoy says that 'how humans should live' is the most important issue in the pursuit of learning —emphasizing the most important aspect of life. But people see the pursuit differently. There are words like "Carpe Diem!" (Seize the Day) make the most of the present time and give little thought to the future.

  

Pushkin emphasized hope: "Don't be sad or angry even if life deceives you." You have the romantic hope of  Maurice Leblanc: "Loving and being poor is better than being rich without love."  but than again to the  contrary,  William Thackeray wants to know does anybody have what they want? Will anyone be satisfied with what they want? 'Vanity Fair' gives insight into the futility of life. "Ah! Vanitas Vanitatum! ... Which of us has his desire, or having it, is satisfied?"

The life we have lived is different, and the world we see is of course different. But if there is an important standard for identifying and judging what kind of life to live, it is conscience. Conscience is God's gift that we all have, and it identifies everything and leads us on to the right path.

The Catholic Church interprets conscience as "knowing together" in Latin, "Consientia," and teaches that conscience is "the voice of God" who has embedded this  law  inside of us ( Second chapter of Gaudium et Spes verse 16). Humanity, body and soul, heart and conscience, intellect and will is a unique being with the ability to distinguish between what is ethically good from what is not good and has the capability and  will to follow it. At the same time, conscience is the holy of hollies, the place where God is with us. It's a court of law and a confessional. Although the Gospel does not express much about this conscience, it describes the phenomenon of remorse related to conscience working in Judas, (Matt. 27:4) and Peter (Mark 14:72), who betrayed their teacher.

On the other hand, the word conscience is mentioned a lot in the letters of the apostle Paul. He says that for believers, acting according to conscience means acting by faith (Rom. 14: 23). We must recall that mistakes and errors occur when conscience is denied. We must be conscious of ethical judgments, acknowledge the stimulation of conscience, develop the ability to recognize this stimulation, and foster  and maintain this ability.

 

In the Compendium of the Social Doctrine of the Church, a great deal is made of of the concept of  conscience. The Golden Rule for our growth in Humanity. Both as individuals and church, we are urged to act according  to conscience in the concrete places of life, and teaches us that the church's conscience is a tool to identify God's Word, freedom, and morality. The world constantly tests our conscience. What is your biggest enemy in the world now? Not caring about injustice in search of money and profit— thinking the world, neighbors, and conscience don't matter.

This has devastating and terrifying consequences. Can we really take responsibility for such an idea? Indeed, we rather lose more when conscience has disappeared from life.  A life without conscience, can't be a good to any person, one will not be living an honorable life, but a life avoiding God? Love, hope, faith, dreams and ideals, life and reality should all grow based on correctness. And this right hope begins with conscience.

"The Church's social doctrine is therefore of a theological nature, specifically theological-moral, 'since it is a doctrine aimed at guiding people's behavior' This teaching ... is to be found at the crossroads where Christian life and conscience come into contact with the real world. It is seen in the efforts of individuals, families, people involved in cultural and social life, as well as politicians and statesmen to give it a concrete form and application in history. In fact, this social doctrine reflects three levels of theological-moral teaching: the foundational level of motivations; the directive level of norms for life in society; the deliberative level of consciences, called to mediate objective and general norms in concrete and particular social situations. These three levels implicitly define also the proper method and specific epistemological structure of the social doctrine of the Church" (#73 Compendium of the Social Doctrine).

Living the 'Joy of Love'

In the Eyes of the Believer Column of the Catholic Times the writer reports on what it's like to have three generations living together. 

They are watching not only the growth of their children but also the life of the elderly entering their twilight years. Her mother-in-law, who is over 80 years old, because of the pandemic is no longer going to the parish senior citizens' program and the neighborhood meeting of the elders has stopped, making her spend more time at home and has grown noticeably weaker.

The process of aging is increasing, more pain here and there, and the number of things that can be done is decreasing. She has expressed concern that she will not be able to move without other people's help soon.

When her mother-in-law told her that she has lived long enough and is ready for death, the children burst into tears as if their grandmother would be leaving them now. Children who have entered puberty complain that they don't agree with their grandmother's thoughts and standards, which are deeply rooted in Confucian values but just thinking about the moment when grandmother will no longer be with them brings great sadness. Parents have great difficulty communicating with teenagers these days, so it's not easy for the young to understand the values and mindset of the grandmother's generation, who was born in the Japanese colonial era and lived through the most difficult times, but love for each other overcomes all differences.

It is a great grace for her that three generations live together in her household. In Korea, single and two-person households account for 60% of the total population. Some people say it's difficult to live with the mother-in-law in the world these days, but in fact, thanks to her mother-in-law's "carrying them", they can live their social lives without major difficulties or worries while raising two children. And because there are adults in the house, the whole family moves more diligently and sincerely, and the habit of saving without throwing food and things away was ingrained. The wisdom of life that she learned living with her mother-in-law is a great legacy for her and the children.

Meanwhile, her own mother, remembers the whole family and prays for all, even if they don't live together, she is passing on the joy of faith. Her mother starts the day with prayer and even though she is over seventy years old, she is still busy working as a village head in the parish. She learned the life of faith by watching her mother take care of her neighbors who were in trouble, make delicious food, and always sharing with others. The mother's prayer and confession of faith, always thanking God for each day and the little joys of life, are proof of her great faith in the whole family. She is passing on a great legacy.

This year, Pope Francis celebrated the fifth anniversary of the publication of the Apostolic Exhortation Amoris Laetitia on the beauty and joy of love in the family. On the same day, the Pope launched the "Amoris Laetitia Family Year" which will conclude on June 26, 2022. The Pope's exhortation, "Joy of Love", states:  "This is the plea of the elderly, who fear being forgotten and rejected. Just as God asks us to be his means of hearing the cry of the poor, so too he wants us to hear the cry of the elderly." Grandmothers and grandfathers are "living memories" of each family and "evidence of faith", and asks them, embracing the young together,   to confront the "throw away culture".(see paragraphs 191-193).

The Pope often says that as capitalism intensifies, young people are driven to competition and the elderly are abandoned as useless and that the elderly and the younger generation should ally together and confront the logic of the world that judges only values based on ability and efficiency.

She hopes that the painful and sick life of old age will not be filled with misery, but with respect and joy as a natural journey of life. When her parents' lives are so respected, her own life will be respected, and the generations of young children will learn and make their own the dignity of life. She would like to express her love and gratitude to parents on Parents' Day and pray to God to wisely lead families to share their joy and love in good health for a long time.

A Wonderful New World?

In 1932, Aldous Huxley (1894-1963) published a novel called "Brave New World," a satirical portrayal of a future society in which all human beings are artificially manufactured thanks to science. In the Diagnosis of the Current Times Column of the Catholic Peace Weekly, an ethicist gives the readers something to think about.

The future world painted here is real to us living in the era of the Fourth Industrial Revolution. The "Great New World" aims for a utopia of "sharing, equality, and stability," but ironically, its meaning is defined within very strict controls.

All humans are artificially fertilized in test tubes, cloned, and cultivated in hatching incubators. Humans are mass-produced by cloning as many identical twins as possible. According to social demand, ranks are already determined in glass bottles and are born with chemical treatment (in current technology, through genetic manipulation) to meet appropriate intellectual and physical conditions.

Aldous is the grandson of the famous biologist Thomas Henry Huxley. Perhaps because of his extensive biological knowledge, the artificial hatching he describes is easily linked to IVF, human cloning, artificial uterus, and genetic manipulation at the current level of science and technology. The beginning of life, alienated from marital love, is already frequently practiced in our society. Human cloning technology has also been a controversial issue for a long time. The artificial uterus is also under study; Eugenics (improving the human species by selecting specific desirable hereditary traits) is possible due to advances in gene-editing technology. 

 

In the novel, the State nurtures and educates children. Education while sleeping, all listening to recorded voices on discipline and receiving brainwashing education on right and wrong, good and bad until adulthood. Children are encouraged to have free sex. On the surface, they seem to acquire sexual freedom, but the meaning of sex understood is very limited. 

Under these circumstances, there can be no concept of "family" in this world. The term 'mother' and 'father' is an unpleasant fact, and 'pregnancy' is defined as a barbaric act. Monogamy is also subject to criticism and vigilance. Meeting one person for more than a few months is abnormal. Rather, it is normal to meet several people at the same time. Sex is thoroughly separated from love and seeks only pleasure. One is to be everything to all. Consumption is always a good thing, and happiness is easy to reach. You can take a drug called 'soma'.

"There is a 'soma' that calms anger, reconciles with the enemy, helps one to endure, and tolerates suffering. In the old days, it was a virtue that could only be reached after much effort and long training. But now you swallow a pill and you'll reach that level of discipline, everyone can be a good person…to master the Christian spirit without shedding tears of repentance - that is the essence of 'Soma'.

In fact, this novel satirizes the serious crisis of modern civilization that we feel is a reality, not a utopia. Totalitarianism, closely related to advances in science, because it comes with ideas and cultures that are material, hedonistic, consumptive, and thoroughly separate sex, love, and life. So, in the current situation in our society where 'life culture' and 'death culture' are fighting a dramatic battle, we need to develop a keen critical sense to discern true values and real needs" (Gospel of Life #95).

Month of May and Nostalgia for Family

Every Year on Parents Day, this year on Saturday, May 8th, he remembers May 8, 1979, the day he held his mother's hand tightly and thanked his parents for their love and kindness, and left home to continue his education in Seoul. The writer reminisces on the intervening years in the Peace Column of the Catholic Peace Weekly and on the film Minari.

That day he remembers taking the bumpy road from his house to the Expressway bus to Seoul. The view that opened outside his seat window was like what he saw on his black and white TV screen—an unknown new world, never seen before. People were living in high-rise apartment buildings lined up like square matchboxes, and no matter how much he leaned back, he couldn't even see the roof of the building. The most difficult thing in his new life was the mockery of his new friends: a country bumpkin with a dialect.

Human history itself is a soap opera of constant migration and anti-war feeling. Although born in the image of God, humans have different skin colors, different lifestyles, and different cultures. There are various reasons for the life of the migrant. Some have been forced to leave their hometowns due to war, natural disasters, and political persecution, and migrants heading to a "land of opportunity" at home and abroad with hopes of a better life.

The American film "Minari", in which Korean actors speak Korean, made the U.S., a country of immigrants, cry. A film about the joys and sorrows of a Korean family who chased the American dream to a farm in Arkansas in the 1980s. The actress who played the role of the grandmother was the first Korean actress to win the Best Supporting Actress award.

"Minari" is the true story of director Lee Isaac Chung's family. The grandmother, went to the U.S. from Korea to take care of her grandchildren for her daughter, a couple who started a farm. She brings a bag full of red pepper powder, anchovies, herbal medicine, and parsley seeds. The movie starts on the land (farm), the new home of the family, and ends on the land (minari field). At the beginning of the movie, the father tells his son: "It's the most fertile land in America," holding the soil in his hand. And in the last scene, he says this while looking at the  parsley planted by his grandmother: "Grandmother chose a very good place."

Like parsley, migrants can live well anywhere with tough vitality and adaptability, regardless of whether the land is fertile or barren. However, they are frustrated and fail because of the boundaries as strangers that can be seen but not easily crossed. It requires vigilance, because of discrimination, contempt, and ostracism for not recognizing each other's 'differences.

Back in history, we were all migrants or strangers and many will continue to live their lives in many places of the world as strangers. In the movie, the grandchild falls asleep in the arms of his grandmother, who avoided the grandmother because she smelled, and his heart disease got better. In a crisis of family dissolution due to a father chasing only money, the family becomes one, hugging each other, crying, even though the storage of crops was burned due to the grandmother's mistake.

Movement because of Covid-19 is restricted, but the number of people crossing borders continues to increase in search of jobs, safety, and a better future. But everyday life is becoming increasingly harsh with discrimination and ostracism. The weight of a weary and sad life weighs on the shoulders of many. 

This is the season when he misses the smell of the soil in his hometown and the scent of his mother's arms, terribly. In May, the Family Month and the month of Mary, the Lord asks us: Where is your family now? "I don't know. Am I the guardian of my family?" We know not to answer the Lord like this.

Refrain From Unearned Income

Many Christians are perplexed not knowing the standards to determine what is rich and what is poor. With these words, a Catholic University professor of economics begins his article in the Kyeongyang magazine.

In the Scriptures, wealth is seen at times as good and other times as sinful. This is true also of poverty. Wealth is God's blessing and the Church and society have no problem with the search but at the same time, we are told to imitate Jesus who was poor. They both have their roots in the Scriptures.

Is this then a contradiction in the Scriptures? No! There is no value judgment on either poverty or wealth—rather on the kind of wealth and poverty.  The wealth that comes with sweat and effort is praised that which is not has no value and is sinful.
 

The poverty that comes from the actions of others or from natural disasters and the structures of society, God is always on the side of those suffering. They are blessed. However the poor because of laziness or from their own fault the Scriptures considers it sinful.

Income can be received by effort or without effort. Income received with labor or capital investment in production is considered income with effort, speculation, stealing, and by immoral means is income received without effort.

The income from effort is seen with joy on the part of God and the wealth should be used wisely, it's a blessing. Wealth without effort is not seen as a blessing. God sees those who suffer from the results of this unearned income and sees them as blessed.

If one is to have peace of mind with the income from labor it is necessary to have equal rights to the land. We need places to work but if one doesn't have the right to land, insecurity will always follow. If all the citizens had equal rights to the land and speculation on land ceased, the unearned income would disappear, income from effort would be present and vitality would return and places of work would increase.   

In the Scriptures when God determined the distribution of the land it was to prevent the possibility of unearned income. The income from effort requires sacrifice, greed has no place.

"They will build houses and inhabit them, plant vineyards, and eat their fruit. They will not build for others to live in or plant so that others can eat. For my people will live as long as trees, and my chosen ones wear out what their hands have made. They will not toil in vain or beget children to their own ruin for they will be a race blessed by Yahweh, and their children with them" Isaiah (65:21-23).

"Woe to those who add house to house and join field to field until everywhere belongs to them and they are the sole inhabitants of the land" Isaiah (5:8}.

The recent scandal associated with the Korea Land and Housing Corp. (LH) purchasing land allegedly based on classified information, has helped drop the president's approval rating and of his partly dramatically.

There is no future for a country where high-ranking officials and policy enforcers seek unearned income, regardless of legality. The behavior of these people will soon be transmitted to the majority of the population.

In this way, a country where the majority of its people cling to unearned income, not hard-earned income, eventually goes under. Doesn't the Bible and human history prove it?

Sex Education in the Korean Catholic Church

 

How can families with adolescent children form a culture of love and life? In the Catholic Times, an article introduces the readers to the place of education on sexuality for adolescents and the ways to nurture this culture.

"Sex education that awakens the dignity of life should be conducted at home first." The Bishops' Conference of Korea in its Home of Love and Life message states the Family is the first school to cultivate richer humanity, meaning "sex and life education is up to parents."

In this regard, Pope John Paul II also said in paragraph 37 of the Apostolic Exhortation on the Role of Christian Families: "Since sex education is a fundamental right and duty of parents, it should always be conducted at home or in educational institutions chosen and controlled by parents."

Regarding the indispensable role of parents, the Bishops make clear that what is most important in the sex and life education of families is the example and values of the parents. This means that in a family that is a community of love, parents should practice love through self-gift and set an example of sharing, consistency, service, cooperation, and sacrifice for their children through loyalty and dedication between couples.

 

"Parents should recognize the importance of chastity and understand the dignity and meaning of life, not just the body and selfish pleasures." It is difficult to expect sound sex ethics for children by dealing with sex issues as taboo and ignoring them. Parents should acknowledge that their children live in a different world from their generation's values, and need to understand their children's culture.

Then how should sex education be conducted in families with adolescent children? The Vatican Family Council explains in its guidance on family education: "Human sex, its true character, and true meaning." Personal dialogue between parents and children, and education within the family. This means that it is more important than anything else to consider the reliable open dialogue between parents and children, which means to consider their stage of growth and to respect them as individuals.

In this regard, the director of the Korean Teen Star program, also said, "Parents and children should be able to talk openly about their bodies and fertility." This means that parents should not unilaterally force their children to think or oppose their children's ideas unconditionally, but parents should keep asking questions so that they can find answers and be the mentors to their children on what is right or wrong.

 

"It is important for parents to listen to their children's emotional changes and interests, look at their children as independent human beings. Sex education is not only a time to teach, but showing love, the love received in the family enables the child to see fully the value of his life and to go out into society to share that love with others.

Pope Francis in his Apostolic Exhortation Joy of Love, in paragraphs 280-286: "It is not easy to approach the issue of sex education in an age when sexuality tends to be trivialized and impoverished..." Pope Francis emphasizes the importance of positive and prudent sex education according to age, to develop critical thinking against excessive stimuli that can undermine the truth of sex, and to help men and women respect and understand differences and accept their bodies as they are.

 Teen STAR (Sexuality Teaching in the context of Adult Responsibility) means "natural sex education in the context of adult responsibility" and is currently used in 39 countries around the world, including Korea. It is sex education that helps people realize their sexual characteristics and reproductive abilities and have self-determination skills to establish mutual personal relationships with others. The purpose is to understand gender not only physically but also emotionally, socially, intellectually, and spiritually.