We talk a lot about happiness these days says a religious sister who
writes and teaches in the field of spirituality. Her article appears on
the opinion page of the Catholic Times.
She wonders
whether the reason for this interest is the leisure many have found.
Talking about the subjective elements of happiness is not easy. To speak
about happiness objectively, and try to measure the degree of happiness
is also difficult, and to compare the degrees of happiness with other
countries doesn't really make much sense, however, in one of the
comparisons with developed countries of the world, Korea comes out near
the bottom. Korea's economic development has improved greatly, but the
happiness index has not kept up with the material development. Why not?
she asks.
She uses the study made by a college professor
who feels that a lot has to do with the factors surrounding a Korean's
desires. A Korean world view has a great deal to do with family,
present day blessings, and a fusion of worldly blessings and recompense
for the hardships of working in the competitive world in which we live.
The blessings are worldly blessing.
At the start of a
New Year we are wishing others good fortune and what is being wished is
different for each person, but the professor believes good fortune
would be wealth, honors, good health and the like, not internal qualities. Consequently, in our society with excessive competition and a
culture which considers order and rank as important, we have many factors that militate against happiness.
We who are Christians are born in this society and can't help but be influenced by the culture. The desire for worldly blessings should not be our only desire. We
have to appreciate the mystery of pain and difficulties of life.
Difficulties in life can make our life more fruitful.
Where
is the person that can go through life without problems? We all have
different ways of accepting the joys and sorrows of life. We need the wisdom to accept serenely the pain and difficulties of life for it will be the key in finding happiness.
We
already know, she says, that happiness and unhappiness co-exist. There
is a time to be happy and to be sad, a time to cry and a time to
laugh.... She gives us two maxims that express the idea that we really
don't know whether success is success or failure is failure until we look back in retrospect. Our attitude is all important.
She
wants us to begin the new year with a trust in providence. Open to accept all the variety of things that may come our way: mature
Christians asking God for the grace to be born again at the start of this new year.
Eul-Mi New Year, begins today. Eul is from the second of the
Heavenly Stems, and Mi, the Chinese character for sheep, the 8th
animal of the Earthly Branches. This is the beginning of the year of
the sheep. In the 60 year cycle we are in the 32rd year which began in
1984. Each year is calculated with a term (Chinese character) from the Heavenly Stems
which number 10, and another character from the Earthly Branches which
number 12, making 60 different combinations. This is not the solar
reckoning, but the lunar calendar which is transferred to the solar calendar for convenience sake.
Both
Catholic Papers had an editorial for the readers on the hope we should
have for the new year. Of the twelve animals in the Asian Zodiac, Christians would have great sympathy for sheep because of the place they have in our
Bible. Right from the first book of the Bible we see that the Israelites
began as shepherds and kept that love for the life of the shepherd.
The
sheep is a gentle animal, it lives at peace with other animals and does
no harm to others and provides us with food, milk and wool. Jesus is called the lamb of God and we know how full of meaning that is for us,
Each
year at this time we begin the New Year with hope in our hearts. In
fact, it is just like any other day but the sentiments that come with
the New Year allow us to think of a new beginning which is always
healthy and gives hope. When hope is missing there is no new
beginning, and even if the thought should be there there is no
meaning. Hope is what supports our life, and
the motive force that keeps us moving forward. This is true not only
for those who have hope but those who have despaired and lost hope
we pray that they regain the hope that will allow them to begin again.
To make
sure that our hope is more than a mirage but a hope that gives joy and
vitality there are some conditions. We have to remember the past, examine our life, and have a change of heart. Necessary is to see what
was done well, and what was not. What was not done well we need to make a
firm resolve to change. We have the example of the Sewol tragedy, the
many accidents and evil practices that bring us much pain and help us to be
motivated to change what needs to be changed.
We
also have many good things that we can be thankful for in the past
year. The pope's visit to Korea gave us reasons to hope for a better
future and the ways to achieve it. Happy New Year to all.
On the spirituality page of the Catholic Times the columnist mentions meeting with a priest only a few years younger, who still had his youthful looks."What is the secret for staying so young?" he asked with an inkling of jealously.
"Thanks, for thinking so. There is no secret, I am living with a community in which we are sharing happiness and for that I am grateful."
"You must be busy in the parish work?"
"All is very ordinary. By the way, interestingly, at the last pastoral council meeting we did make a big decision."
"What was that?"
"In the area of the parish, because of poverty, many have registered their marriages but have never had a ceremony. The parish decided to take care of all the expenses for the marriages."
"Are you saying that it will be completely free for those who want a marriage ceremony?"
"Yes, for those who can't pay for the photographer we will take care of even that expense. We have arranged for the guests to have a meal at a restaurant close to the parish that serves a beef soup with rice, and is very tasty. However, if they find that a burden the parish will feed them a noodle meal at the parish hall. We will be responsible for all the expenses, for the flowers and the use of the facilities. It will be simple but all free. Even one of the Catholics who has a large beauty shop has offered to take care of the preparations for the make up and the hair dressing needs for the bride. We are taking pride as a community to be able to help those in need."
The columnist hearing what his friend said remembered the words of a parishioner he heard some years before. They were looking for a beautiful parish Church with a large parking lot. But when they went to ask about the ceremony, the expenses were such that it was impossible to think of having the ceremony in the Church. The poor are not welcomed.
The columnist on saying good bye to his friend before he took the bus to his parish offered to preside at the services if necessary. His friend laughed, and got on the bus. He was proud to see a pastor do something about the problems with marriages in the Church.
A recent topic of discussion was the video seen on the news and the internet of a monkey who saved the life of another monkey, electrocuted on a railroad track in India. Seeing the unconscious monkey his fellow monkey with great effort tried to revive the
monkey by biting the throat and face and ferociously shaking the
monkey. There was a pool of water besides the track in which they
repeatedly dumped the monkey and at the end of 20 minutes of frantic
effort on the part of the two fellow monkeys the unconscious monkey was
revived. Those seeing this video were heard to say monkeys are
better than humans in showing concern for one another.
The
columnist of the Peace Weekly on the opinion page of the paper
expresses sadness in hearing that in this present society such words can
be heard. Humans are in a higher state of life but we see actions in
our world that do not even reach that of the monkeys in the video. Our
intellects should help us act humanly. Our intellects do not only help
us to live human-like but nuture a mature faith life. Reason is a great
gift given to us by the Creator that not only leads us by love to God but helps to open our eyes to his presence.
In society
we see many whose faculty to reason has been paralyzed. Many are the
young people who have become accustomed to blurting our abusive language
very naturally. We have children who abandon and kill their parents; quarrels among family over inheritance. Issues that you would not
imagine happening in the animal kingdom, and we are living in
an enlightened civilization.
Jared Diamond in Guns,Gems, and Steel: The Fates of Human Societies, a
best seller, is quoted as saying: 'As civilization grows the human
family bonds get weaker and with stratification of society tenderness begins to disappear.' The society that we have made with wealth has made for a class society and our descendents will see the results.
However, Diamond says there is no reason
to be frustrated for with our reason we can work to make things work
out differently. We can recover from the decline caused by money, the
lack of virtue and the individualism in society by our efforts to purify the society. However, if we are to be successful in purifying
our civilization we have to use our reason and begin with a respect for
the dignity of the human person.
"Another cause of slavery is corruption on the part of people
willing to do anything for financial gain. Slave labor and human
trafficking often require the complicity of intermediaries, be they law
enforcement personnel, state officials, or civil and military
institutions. This occurs when money, and not the human person, is at
the center of an economic system. Yes, the person, made in the image of
God and charged with dominion over all creation, must be at the center
of every social or economic system. When the person is replaced by
mammon, a subversion of values occurs” (Pope Francis' Peace Message 2015).
The
columnist ends his words by asking all of us to help the world that is
dying be energized by the breath of God. We have to assist in this
work and not give up. We have to nurture this dream in our
communities.
How does one get rid of a fixed idea? This was a topic in a round
table discussion sponsored by the Catholic Digest. One of the
participants, a priest nearing retirement age, looking over his own life
experiences, expressed his opinion.
Often he says
people would come to him with their problems; expressing their
frustrations and looking for help. Financial, family, marriage problems
and the like, and he would listen. During the listening he would ask questions, if not clear, or get clarification in what was said, in most
cases those who came for help end up with their own solutions.
Many who came for help were filled with anguish over their
situation and by just talking over the issue they found release from the hold their thoughts had over them. When they found
peace from the encounter with the priest it gave him great joy.
In
his own life what brought him much joy and peace, and the stimulus to
change his way of life was time spent in meditation. He remembers
hearing in a lecture the words 'God of history' which entered his
head not to be forgotten. The way God entered the life of the
Israelites, God was entering his own life and he wanted to uncover the
ways he responded over the years.
He was not
baptized as an infant but while in the sixth grade of Elementary School,
and he went on to the seminary high school. He felt that he was being
led along the way by an invisible hand, which was God's will for him. As
a deacon he wanted to go to Germany for studies but although the other
students failed the test he thought he would pass the screening, but he
also failed. If he had passed the exam he would have been ordained to
the priesthood in Germany but having failed he was able to be
with his family at ordination.
He was given a
scholarship to study in France where he went on to study Asian
philosophy hoping to write about theology from an Asian perspective.The studies helped him greatly to look for the will of God in his own
life. Finding what God wants from him is where he is able to find
happiness.This is the best way of not being a slave to obsessions that can bring havoc into our lives.
Today is Holy Family Sunday and the sermon in the Seoul Bulletin
wants us to see an aspect of family life we overlook. A celebrity who
because of some irregularities was absent from the limelight for some
time made an appearance on the stage and told the audience: "When I was in trouble it was only my family that gave me support and strength."
When the priest hears these and similar words he feels uncomfortable. Often we reduce the meaning of family to suit are special understanding of
what a family is. It becomes a shield to protect ourselves and to exclude
others.
From whom do we get our biggest scars? The
hurts usually come from those that I know best, from those nearest to
me. Those who are not close to us, even if the words are meant to
inflict great harm, they don't do much damage. We have little difficulty
in ignoring them. But it is different with those close to us:
violence in the family, conflict between the parents, indifference to
the others in the family is another matter. Violence in the family is
so embarrassing one is not able to speak about it. Many psych themselves to say it is no serious problem but the scars that are inflicted, contrary to what we may think, are many.
Not
far in the past we had many families living together in rented homes in
the same building. Provided the owner was a decent person, they would
all live in harmony concerned with each others needs.
Today with the advances that have been made, many of the needs
have disappeared. But the members of the priest's generation remember those days and how the families lived harmoniously with one another.
We
have become independent of others with the technological advances. Neighbors have disappeared. We have become oblivious of our surroundings. We are
only concerned with ourselves and our families. When we watch the news the problems of others have no connection with ourselves.
He concludes the sermon wondering if we are not just interested in taking care of the needs of the family and all else is immaterial.
We
call this the feast the Holy Family. Confucianism
has influenced our society to a great extent and the virtues of
humanness and etiquette have helped to make the family strong. Filial
piety was strongly emphasized. Christianity has introduced God, and his providence, by remembering we are members of many other communities helps to make our families holy.
Reading with the eyes only is not reading. Likewise seeing an image
only with the eyes is not to see. The Catholic Times' column: Electronic and Book World wants us to reflect on the meaning of these words.
What
we see, read or hear requires an effort to interpret the meaning. We
are living, buried in an avalanche of information and when it gives no
meaning to our lives it is of little value. There is much reading with
little understanding which makes us functionally illiterate. She quotes
Alvin Toffler who said that modern illiterates: "no longer want to
learn and are not able to read the information they receive."
When
I read something and remember it there is some meaning. The difference
between meaning and no meaning is vast. When we read or see something
this should not be a simply act of reading but with perception we gain
knowledge and meaning by the process of interpretation. This requires
the activity of the mental and spiritual dimensions of the person. A
research team at Washington University in the science of the mind, she
explains, discovered when something was see without any meaning only a
small area at the back of the brain was activated but when the same
thing was see and given meaning new channels were opened. The moment
meaning was added to the reading more neurons in the brain were
activated, two and three times more. When we perceive and interpret, our
mental world can't help but be changed.
Don't we say
we see the world with the personality we have developed? We
perceive and act according to the meaning we have given to what we have
seen, heard and have become aware. When we stay at the level of
seeing and hearing and don't enter the process to find meaning, we have no hope of changing the way we live. What we see is
not the real, but we make it real by our awareness and interpretation. It will
depend on how much meaning I can give to what I read that will make the world come to
me. Daily we have to ask ourselves are we encountering the real world?
Daily,
in the subway, walking, in the work place when we are fingering for words, images and sound are we just seeing and enjoying the
superficial world in which we are in, and live without meaning as a
wanderer and illiterate?
