Effective Teachers

An educator who was a principal for many years, writes in View from the Ark of the Catholic Times, about  a visit to an Alternative School (non- traditional education) to give a talk to the  parents, an occasion he has never forgotten. The educator had sent the outline of his talk to the  principal of the school and was told it would also be good for the students to hear the talk, so they joined the parents in the lecture hall.

He was somewhat perplexed with the change but  adapted appropriately. During the talk, he kept his eyes on the students and was surprised at their attention, their answers to his questions and their questions.

After the talk, more satisfied than usual, he was especially amazed at the happiness showing on the faces of the students, and without much thought asked a group of students walking along the corridor: "Are you happy?'  The students stopped and answered with one voice. "Yes, we are very happy." Without giving them much time he again asked: "Why?"  One of the students who was lively in his questioning during the lecture answered: "We are respected by the  teachers this makes us happy."  Another girl with the group smiling answered:  "Sir, there is another reason also for the happiness, mothers are not here with us."

The educator had heard that at the beginning of the school year it was not like this. Disorder and confusion was the everyday situation, but with the passage of time and interaction with the teachers all changed. They were away from home and living in dormitories, a different environment from what had been their experience.

Hearing the words of the girl he was embarrassed for the mothers. They heard what was said, and their heads were lowered. No doubt they were thinking  it was their fault their child was not going to the public schools in their area, and  were at a distance from home going to an Alternative School. The educator felt it was not only these mothers who needed to lower their heads. Korean mothers' love for their children requires they give them the best possible education without  concern for the needs of the child. Parents put a great burden on the children and compare them with other children which is  seen as cruelty by the children. Often they put off the religious education of the children until they get into college.

The three requisites in getting into a good school: the grandfathers financial situation, the mothers gathering of information, and fathers lack of interest. This is the reason says the educator for the feeling of some of the children towards their mothers. He quotes  the phrase from chapter 6 of Matthew: "Set you hearts on his kingdom first, and on his righteousness, and all these other things will be given to you as well."

He retells an anecdote about Gandhi. He was approached by a mother who wanted him  to tell the child  to stop eating so many  sweets. Gandhi heard the request and told them to return in 10 days. He had been eating sweets himself and wanted time to not eat sweets so he could speak from his heart and experience. Gandhi's  explanation was sufficient to have the child overcome his habit of eating sweets. The article concludes: mothers, and all of us, have to be doers of the word before we can become Effective teachers.

Forgiveness and Reconciliation

Many reciting the Lord's Prayer have difficulty with the phrase: " forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." The face of the one we can't forgive often appears. These words, of the head of a research center for Scripture, begin her article in the Kyeongyang Magazine.

She recounts how she became estranged from a good friend by what was said. She is over fifty and should know better;  humanly speaking she is embarrassed but even  more so as a Christian and as a teacher of the word of God, the shame is greater.

A Catholic is  a person who lives in a fishbowl. She is conscious of feelings, which cause problems: when her friend is having difficulty, she feels bad and when  all is well with her friend, she loses some of her peace. She has to live with these dual emotions. The  relationship goes back many years and the good times were overwhelmingly greater than the bad.

She made the effort to reconcile with her friend without success. The result was that she felt worse, and brought back all the hurts she received. If she knew  this would be the result of her efforts she would never have attempted the reconciliation, and this became matter for confession.  

At this time, she read a book by a priest that helped her to see the difference between  forgiveness and regret. Forgiveness is something that has to do with herself,  her will and decision: getting rid of the    poisons of hate and anger within oneself and has nothing to do with whether the other person acknowledges it or not. I have the need to forgive.

Reconciliation requires the agreement of both parties; forgiveness does not. Isn't this the reason that Jesus wants us to forgive seventy times seven. When we have  done something against a brother or sister, we have the  duty to ask for reconciliation.

When a relationship has gone bad, it usually is the fault of both parties. I have to forgive and search for ways to reconcile. If reconciliation is not achieved that is not my problem.

Once she understood the difference between forgiveness, and reconciliation there came a great consolation. She  concludes her words with the realization that what she needed to do was to embody in her prayers the teaching of the Lord's Prayer and rid herself of the obstacles preventing her from doing so. 

                                                                                                                                            

Suicides in Korean Society

Korea for the past ten years leads the  developed countries of the world in the number of suicides. Embarrassment is a result of these statistics published each year, and talk of an infrastructure to deal with the problem continues to appear. The Catholic Times covered the story on the front page with an accompanied article and editorial.

The numbers of suicides of those over sixty continues to increase. The statistics according to age, under 60 the numbers of suicides are not much different from other countries, but with the elderly we have a vastly different picture. For 100 thousand of the population we have 29.1 suicides. The average of the other developed countries is 12.1 persons. however, with the elderly it is  80.3 persons. Korea is the only country where we see this discrepancy.

The reason for suicide for those over 65 years of age: health 32.6 percent, financial problems 30.8 percent,  alienation from spouse, children and friends 15.6  percent, loneliness 10.2 percent. Numbers of those who feel there is no place to go for help  are twice that of the other countries. 

The Government did begin programs to help but the article does not think they are much help. Efforts are needed to  understand the culture, the problems of the aged and the different structures  in society before working on the programs. These efforts have been weak.

In comparison to Japan, Sweden and France  the suicide rate for those over 65 is three times that of these countries. Poverty of the elderly in Korea would be the  greatest among the countries of  OECD.  One professor said that the poorer, the sicker and the lonelier  the elderly are, the closer they come to the possibility of suicide. Suicides in  the farming area  compared to the city are much higher: 45.3 percent to 14.1 percent.

The Church's efforts have not been strong in this area except for Seoul and a few dioceses. The many different segments of society are beginning to take an interest and working to set up  networks of support,  but work with the most vulnerable in our society is difficult. The elderly who are living alone are the ones  with whom we have to be connected.

When we hear of the death of a Catholic by suicide it is a great blow to the parish and the community of believers. God is the one who has given us life, we live to give him thanks and  glory, to do his will  and to live so that we will be with him for all eternity. My life does not belong to me. Seeing it with these eyes suicides are going against the love that we should have for ourselves and the love for others. Efforts have to be made to have our communities show concern for those who are most vulnerable and also to help make the society in which we live less concerned for material development at the expense of the more noble qualities of the inner life. The society we have made has driven many to this extreme solution to their problems,  and we need the wisdom to work for a society that killing oneself would not be seen as a possibility. Which puts the burden on all of us.

Catholic Life In Korea

Introspection is a popular subject in the Catholic Church of Korea in anticipation of the visit of Pope Francis. A full page article in the Catholic Times is  headlined: Believers in Search of Material Comfort, Pastoral interest in External Growth, Superficial Spirituality, greets the reader. I don't believe the Korean Church is any different from the Catholicism in other countries, but they have a confidence in expressing themselves since the country is still basically one people and one culture.

The light of faith, says the article, is no longer something one easily sees. A cross section of the Church has become worldly. Individualism, ethical relativism,and the like, makes the Catholics feel uncomfortable with the teaching of the Church. Even the pastoral workers have put the Gospel values on back burner. Materialism, success, functionalism, are the values that are used in the management of the Church. The  spread of an  ornamental spirituality continues.

These words are used to report on a  questionnaire on Church renewal sent to 300 persons in preparation for the pope's visit to Korea. 33.88 percent said that worldliness within the Church is the number one issue for renewal. The second biggest problem according to the questionnaire was authoritarianism and clericalism within the Church. More than the confrontation with the challenges that come from the quick changes in society many of the Christians are content to have the feeling of joy that comes with being saved.

The baptized find it difficult to live the Christian life and many have retreated to an individualistic  understanding of their faith. No different from other countries they are looking for psychological consolation. Anything that will give them this peace of mind is the object of their search This is the reason for many leaving the Church, not  going to Mass and frequenting the Sacraments, the ebbing of the faith life of the young people and wanting to be middle class.

In one of the dioceses in answer to a questionnaire, only 15.6 percent thought religion was the most important value in life. For 43.5 percent the most important value was health. In the Seoul Diocese a questionnaire among the young found that 61.7 percent considered psychological consolation  the meaning of religion. There is the tendency to use God to enjoy what this world has to give. We have become this world orientated for our own satisfaction. Priests at times foster this kind of thinking among the parishioners, which, says the article, is another great problem.

In regards with the culture of life we see the great failure in understanding the teaching of the Church: in a survey that was made in 2004, 87.7 percent said  abortion has to be accepted and 77 percent had no problem with euthanasia. There are many who look upon their religion as a leisure time activity, a way of belonging, and finding satisfaction.

There is also the exterior growth in numbers and buildings used as a  means of judging the strength of  religious faith.This is the way the business world has entered the thinking of the Church. Pope Francis  by his words and actions is giving a great blow to this way of thinking. 

The Catholic Church of Korea has grown quickly externally. but we have not examined closely our mission as Church. We have to be able to see the Church's life from many different angles and draw up a plan of action that does not only include education programs. The article concludes with a quote from  Evangelii Nuntiandi: [Evangelization] "for the Church is a question not only of preaching the Gospel in ever wider geographic areas or to ever greater numbers of people, but also of affecting and as it were upsetting, through the power of the Gospel, mankind's criteria of judgment, determining values, points of interest, lines of thought, sources of inspiration and models of life, which are in contrast with the Word of God and the plan of salvation" (# 19).

"With Communication No Pain"

Heo Jun a physician to the royal court during the Choson Dynasty, in his book Dongui Bogam, we find the phrase: "With communication no pain, without communication pain." A  professor of philosophy in his article in the diocesan bulletin explains to the readers the meaning of the words. All the veins in our body are made to communicate with the cells and organs.  When one of the blood vessels is blocked, and is not able to communicate with the body, we have sickness or death of the cells or organs. This extends also to the social body, without healthy communication between human beings  we have problems: in family, school, society, and  the country; the difference is only in size. Communication is a sign of the health of our different groups in society.

The dictionary meaning for the word communicate:  not blocked, opened to another, understanding another. He compares it to water that flows freely.  It  is the connection with others. Not only is it  words shared with another, but the extended meaning is the relation we have with the other.

He shared his thinking on the theological and human levels of communicating. Humans are persons who are separated. In our Scriptural theological understanding, humans were living with God in paradise and because of disobedience lost paradise. Since they were separated from God, they needed a way of relating with God different from what it was in paradise. They were separated from their source  and speaking in theological words needed to be saved. Separated existences try to achieve the original relationship with God. This relationship is not something that we can do on our own. Since the communication has broken down we can't but be uncomfortable. This in theological language is called anxiety of separation, and we try everything to renew our relationship with God the source of all.

Humans are separated existences. We were one with our mothers in the womb. We came out of the womb attached with the umbilical cord. When that is cut, we become separated existences. With this separation, we are overcome with  separation anxiety. Because of the separation, the  mother with the constant interaction with the child, the separation anxiety disappears. The child feels the connection with the mother and when this is confirmed life is renewed. From birth to age three, this integration with the mother has to be  strengthened and  confirmed. This  attachment to the mother has to be established. When during this period, the attachment of the mother to the child is not communicated, there will be the trauma from anxiety because of separation that will affect all of life.

As seen from the above, persons are separated individuals both from a human and a theological point of view.  If we were complete in ourselves, we would not need others with whom to relate or a need to communicate. Because we are separated existences, we have a need to relate and to communicate with others.  We need other separated persons to live the full life;  and we  cannot do this without conflict and discord. We need to familiarize ourselves  with this method of living:the art of relating and communicating with others. To summarize ultimately a full life requires:  understanding,  meeting, relationships, co-existence  and survival.

"Grief Will be Turned to Joy"

Current predictions by the World Health Organization foresee that by 2030, melancholia will be the leading cause of illness. Korea presently is a leader in the number of cases of melancholia, so  begins the article by a Salesian priest writing in the Bible and Life magazine. Widespread is a structure of excessive competition, materialism, inhumanity, the sudden appearance of the nuclear family, making us islands, and disposing us to feelings of depression. Melancholia  has many forms, he says, the young person's depression, those taking exams, after giving birth, buying on credit, seasonal depression, after success...  nobody is far from depression.

The Sewol ferry tragedy has exposed us to  these feelings. The families of  the dead, those who survived, those who witnessed the tragedy, the citizens have experienced great sadness.  The families of the victims have lost an important meaning for life. We have to cry with these families.

In Scripture, we have prominent examples of those who suffered from this malady: David, Jonah, Elijah. David in psalm 31:10 cries: Have pity on me, O Lord, for I am in distress; with sorrow, my eye is consumed; my soul also, and my body."

The priest mentions as a youth having to fight against sickness for a number of years. During this period, he suffered from depression. In the morning when he opened his eyes it was not how he was to live happily that day, but was he going to make it through the day. Everything seemed insignificant, meaning for life disappeared and all he wanted to do was to avoid  the gaze of others. It was, he said,  a frightful experience.

In the beginning, melancholia is like a cold of the spirit and can be handled by the person's efforts. With exercise, walks, mountain climbing, emptying ourselves and the like does work. When it gets too much for us, we can go to the specialists for help.  Christians have a primary physician in Jesus, and he will free us from our depression. There is nothing like a positive and active life of faith as a treatment for depression.

The reason for melancholia he suggests is despair. A loss of hope and the despair comes from too much of a trust in oneself and others. We are all disposed to despair. As Christians, we can always get up with the help of Jesus.We are not  discouraged or frustrated, and we don't want the melancholia to increase so we get up and continue to hope.

He gives us the example of a prisoner of war in a concentration camp. Never sure if there would be another day. One of the prisoners died of sorrow, and he decided to do something. In the same cell were citizens of other nations who spoke different languages, and he suggested they learn each other's language.The cell block from a place of great boredom became a high-class language school.  He learned during the two years that remained: English, Spanish,  Portuguese and Polish enabling him to converse in these different languages with a certain amount of ease. After he was released, he began his own Trade Company and did well.

For a Christian, difficulties are only the  prelude to happiness, Even at times when we do not see any meaning to life God is there and when we realize this, all becomes possible.The priest  finished the article  with the passage from  John 16:20:   "I tell you truly: you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices; you will grieve for a time, but  your grief  will be turned to joy."