Looking for the Blessings of Old Age

"If only I was a little younger... ." A religious sister who is in charge of a center for spirituality begins her column in the Peace Weekly with this reflection.

Tomorrow  Korea celebrates Chuseok, the Autumn New Moon Festival one of the biggest holidays in South Korea. The family clans will gather, give thanks, remember the deceased, pray, chat and enjoy each other's company with a memorable meal that ties it all together. Many will remember the past and bring up their sadness and joys. The recent Typhon and great damage will be very much in the talk among families as will the the topic of death.
 
Sister remembers chatting with a friend and uttering the  statement wishing she were younger without much thought. Her friend who was listening quietly said loudly: "Right, I would be able to do much more if I were 10 years younger." And they both burst out laughing.

They both knew they were talking nonsense, saying things without meaning. With a tickling sensation in her throat: “Maybe we will be saying the same thing in ten years." Her friend's face suddenly expressed great sadness.

"The days, weeks and months change so quickly. It's too fast. Life is short? My mind is impatient. All goes around and continues to go around. One thinks they will be around forever but the time is limited and this brings sadness."

"What makes aging uncomfortable and sad? I imagined a lot of things would get better as I got older, but that is not what happens. I thought I'd be freer and more generous as I got older, but it is so different from what I hoped for? I thought I would get over worrying about the small things but that is not the case. I don't know why I am faced with so many uncomfortable thoughts."

Yes. As we grow older, many of us think that we will grow into nicer adults, know more, become wiser, more accepting and leave much behind. But is that what happens? As you get older, pretending seems to increase. Pretending to be okay, but it's not really. Even though they say "understand" to their juniors, they are pretentious... "I don't care about that," but they do care. We pretend and play it cool that age means little but that is also a lie. Getting old is scary.

One day the sister saw an older and a few years younger man, arguing. The older man said quietly: "That is not the way you speak to an elder." Then the younger of the two shouted loudly: "If you are an adult, you should act like an adult." The older person muttering to himself and pain showing on his face quickly disappeared. She concluded that both wanted to be recognized and accepted. This is the desire of the elderly and the reason in most cases for feeling uncomfortable and sad.

She reminds the elderly not to struggle to have others show respect for old age. Rather than spending time looking to see if the eyes of others are directed towards you, it would be better to spend time looking into your own heart. As you grow older, even if there is nothing that stands out it's a good idea to look at yourself. Looking into the good and not so good, but accepting yourself.  Taking things as they come with a peaceful heart is this not a great blessing? We can give thanks for accepting dissonance and limitations. Would it not be wonderful if we could thrill with excitement for the beautiful days ahead?

Local Values in Global Times

Nowadays, one easily knows what's happening in the global village. In the markets, you can find shampoos and groceries from multinationals in Africa, the Himalayan, you can buy handicrafts made by a tribe of the Amazon jungle in American shopping malls. In the Peace Weekly, a university professor gives the readers something to think about.

Targets for the multinational corporation, mostly from the developed countries, are the whole global village. The market is not only the wealthy countries with most consumers but underdeveloped countries with less economic growth and giving them simplified products, with less capacity and cheaper prices. As a result, it is necessary to understand the people's way of living and to make their products to fit the consumer's needs and values.

McDonald's, for example, changes their menus to meet the needs of the host country. In India, they use instead of beef, beans, and other vegetables. In Japan, burgers are made using teriyaki sauce. In China, in their stores, they use a lot of red and the color gold that Chinese people like. In the US, Coca-Cola's commercial is a white bear playing football, in South America, the soccer field is in the background and in China the panda.

Globalization is not only beneficial to large industrial companies. Local values and culture also spread to the rest of the world. Vietnamese food has emerged as a global food connecting Chinese, Japanese, and Mexican foods by word-of-mouth as healthy food for consumers in developed countries who were worried about obesity and adult diseases. Luwak coffee from Indonesia made in a very unappealing way and its scarcity is sold at high prices in developed countries. Increasingly people are going to the polar regions, jungles, and deserts exploring these far off places and experiencing indigenous life.

One thing to note here is the exchange of culture and values that occur in the process of exchanging people and goods. As with the flow of goods, the cultures and values of developed countries usually affect first the third world—their way of life, relationships, and standards of beauty, etc.

Universal values like human rights are now taken for granted in almost all countries. As individualism replaces collectivism, individual freedom and achievement emerge as more important values than group harmony and order. In Asia, Western traits such as white skin, small faces, big eyes, high noses, and long limbs are taken as a new standard of beauty, and the market produces many goods and services that sell this image.

Korea is not free from this influence. Many of the things we understand as natural trends may actually be things we are accustomed to without recognizing where they have come. Imagine a woman who enjoys coffee alone at Starbucks and a young woman who eats miso soup alone at a restaurant. This is still awkward but changing. Eating, drinking and traveling alone are gradually accepted as natural changes.

If so, what culture values are we informing the global community and how are we influencing that community? Are our local values arising in the global village as much as kimchi, healthy food, drama, and smartphone exports?

Obedience and Dependency in Life

What is meant by history? Is it the repetition of conflicts between humans? History begins in time and develops and spreads into space and is recorded— the continuation of challenges and responses, attachments and victories and confidence in the future. Is that the way we see history and the way we should see it? An article in Kyeongyang magazine by a psychiatry professor in the field of anthropology gives us his thoughts on the subject.

Dependency has a negative connotation. We speak of dependency on drugs on the internet etc. We have a gut feeling for freedom and dislike dependency. The word itself carries a lot of negativity and those who are dependent we feel have problems but is this the reality?

We are all dependent. What we eat, drink and wear have been made by others. When sick we go to a doctor, learn from teachers, children depend on their parents and married couples depend on each other during their lives together.

Our complicated structures of society and the variety of our cultures demands dependence. We talk and proclaim freedom and independence but no one is living that kind of life.

Humans appeared on earth about 6 million years ago, for hundreds of thousands of years lived together cooperating as equals. They learned from the previous generation, trades, and the wisdom to deal with their difficult environment. The tribes that hunted and gathered their food were able to live a relatively high living standard with equality among the members. There was little difference among the sexes, roles and functions were accorded to the sexes according to their experience and age but there was equality.

During the early stone age, there was no conflict of rank. No war between tribes. Conflict arises when something is lacking. When something was missing they would move to a different location, no reason to lose life in a war. About 10 thousand years ago in the new stone age, this changed. No need to go into the reasons but people began to live in smaller spaces and we have the appearance of classes, discrimination, divisions between those who had and those who didn't and the beginning of social standing from birth, determining the way life would be lived. Conflicts arose and trust in the group began to appear.

In the new stone, age population increased but life was impoverished and diseases increased: cholera, typhoid fever, tuberculosis, rubella, bubonic plague, and the like. Children born, half would die within the year and 40 percent of the adults would die in war. The harder the life the more conflict between the different groups.

People were dependent on one another but it became dangerous when this became extreme. When people use each other this is no longer innocent dependence and many problems arise. The word obedience has more positive aspects than dependency but in modern society, this is not readily seen. The opposite of obedience when it is successful often brings great material benefits to the person. In Christianity, obedience has great value but today it has a rather ambiguous response in society.

Psychologically dependency is when a person has the intention of getting help from another. When one does passively what another asks we call this the 'good child response'. When this is extreme we call this a dependent personality. One does not make his own decision but does what another wants. The only time he is active is when looking for someone to depend on.

Obedience is different. One is not looking for concern from another but has concern for the other. Since we have little knowledge of the future the wise thing to do is search for the wise person and listen and do what is suggested. This is what the Scriptures teach.

Following the wisdom of the ages and listening to advice and continually reflecting on life rather than the opposite, is healthy. Humans are always discerning what is gain and what is loss. To shut our eyes and ears and do what we are told is not wise.

Independence and freedom will come with obedience. After much thought, once you decide and believe what you do is correct this is obedience. What is precious is not achieved quickly. No matter how anxious one is about the autumn harvest, once you believe, wisdom requires you wait.

Accountablity and Common Good

In the Eyes of the Believer column of the Catholic Times, a sociology professor gives the readers his thoughts after seeing one of the most popular domestic movies of all time: The Admiral: Roaring Currents. 

The movie reveals the unyielding spirit of Admiral Yi Sun-shin against the Japanese in the Imjin war during the Joseon Dynasty (1592). Selfless devotion to one's country, and working for a cause bigger than self-interest, often expressed by presidents and politicians as our goal. However, in many cases, they have worked to maintain their vested interests. Consequently a country's need for accountability and working for the common good.

Accountability is a moral obligation explaining important issues raised in society. The Gwangju Democratization Movement in1980 and the Sewol ferry disaster in 2014 have taught us the value of accountability in our history. No innocent people should be sacrificed by immoral and irresponsible leaders.

A prominent sociologist Robert Bella says accountability is the test of a healthy society. The writer wants to look at the meaning of accountability at the different levels of society.

 First, individual moral accountability is an obligation that requires each citizen to live up to their moral conscience or religious truth. The question: Do you live up to your inner conscience? The answer is the foundation not only in your personal relationships but also in your healthy political participation as a citizen.

 Second, the accountability of the organization is an obligation to meet face-to-face, and be responsible for human rights issues, losses, and unfair decisions that arise within community. The organization's operations should be directed toward the good of all members. If the leader of the organization prioritizes personal tastes or personal interests and makes decisions that go against laws and common sense, the community becomes sick.

Third, public accountability is an obligation to provide explanations and countermeasures in a democracy where constitutional order is violated by abuse or misconduct of power, or when public safety and civil rights are seriously undermined. Public accountability is a top priority for public officials, lawyers, politicians, and journalists who must pursue the common good.

An individual's conscience and moral life is not only an intimate holy sanctuary known only to God but also influences the culture and practices of society. As Hannah Arendt pointed out, however, evil is always with us— the banality of evil— privileges, and shortcuts have been used without conscience as long as they have been in our society.

The principle of public accountability today no longer supports the "normality of evil"! On the other hand, the principle of accountability should not be reduced to a tool of struggle using all means to fight what one doesn't like.

History has developed through dialogue in the conflict between vested interests and those alienated in society. For Christians, this dialectic is not a materialistic interpretation of history but a pilgrimage that embodies justice and peace on earth in God's providence. Public officials and politicians must keep in mind that our society becomes healthier and more just when we lay down our vested interests and do our public accountability in the spirit of selfless devotion to the  country and it citizens.

Green Martyrs of the World

From time to time in novels or dramas, you meet characters as attractive as the main character. Such is the case with the parish priest of Torcy, in the French novel, Diary of a Country Priest (written by Georges Bernanos). In the Peace Column of the Peace Weekly the writer gives the readers his thoughts on the book.

Torcy's pastor is an old priest who tasted the bitters and sweets of life. The experiences of age and failure are embedded in the rough words thrown at a young priest who is appointed to a country church, the hero of the book. The insights he has on the younger priest are right on. The words he uses to encourage the weak hero's courage sound like words without feeling.

It was the older priests way of telling the younger one to not succumb to intellectual vanity but bear witness to the Word of God by an exemplary life. Priests are human beings. One can be puffed up with less than a handful of knowledge which can show in authoritative ways. Repetition of disappointment and failure without success results in resignation. When these feelings keep piling up, one falls into indolence. If you're idle, you're more at risk of succumbing to evil. "Every single time I want to do good it is something evil that comes to hand" (Romans 7,21).
 
The older priest's advice is not to fall into this trap. In the meantime, he must stay awake. The young priest is convinced that the church is moving through times like an army marching through an unknown land without any munitions supplied. Marching troops are uneasy without knowing what danger is in front of them. It is no different than religion pushed to the periphery of society in these unfavorable times with little knowledge of the scale of future challenges.

The situation being such: "Grasp the red hot iron" these words are enticing. This is the advice to all Christians who value the  Word of God. The question is what kind of being do you have to be to grasp the iron? If you grab it with your hands, you're going to be burned. However, doing nothing is a lukewarm faith. Picking up the hot iron with thongs is a form of pragmatism.

The answer is fixed. The only way to grab it is with your bare hands. Courage and determination are needed.  It is not Christian to be consciously neutral given the many problems in society. Say “Yes” when it's “Yes” and "No" when it's "No".

If the church stays in the fort of comfort, corruption cannot be avoided. Evil is indeed evil. The purpose of evil is to destroy good? It's a naive idea. Evil regards it victory to "transform" good into evil. You must throw off your listlessness and begin to act. In this context, Pope Francis' words speak loudly: "I prefer a Church which is bruised, hurting and dirty because it has been out on the streets, rather than a Church which is unhealthy from being confined and from clinging to its own security. I do not want a Church concerned with being at the center and which then ends by being caught up in a web of obsessions and procedures" (The Joy of the Gospel #49).
 
September is the liturgical month of the martyrs. The martyrs are those who grabbed the iron. We try to build a bridge between the past and the present. To witness the truth of the gospel in daily life, one drop of blood and one drop of sweat is the green martyrdom. (Green Martyrdom - Living the ascetic life in the place and position where God places one)

Reappraisal Of Godparents in Catholicism

In recent years looking at the yearly statistics coming from the Bishops' Conference of Korea we see the signs of serious problems within the church. The attendance continues to drop and we have the search for pastoral programs and alternative ways of giving life to the community.
 
A pastor writing in the Peace Weekly recommends to the church-at-large to look again at our tradition of Godparent and to strengthen the bond between the newly baptized and the Godparent. In Korea because of the relatively small number of Catholics they usually have one Godparent, the same sex as the person being baptized. The tradition served well its purpose to guide the newly baptized to spiritual maturity.
 
The reason for the reappraisal of the beautiful tradition within Catholicism is that at present it has become a formality and meaning lost. When this is done out of custom this leads to apathy and weakness of the community of faith and departures from the parish community.
 
Godparents have the responsibility and duty to care and guide their Godchildren on the road to spiritual maturity. They pray for their Godchildren, and to do this they need to grow closer to God and become channels of God's grace to their Godchildren. Nowadays, the whole system is losing its importance and the meaning turned into an empty custom.
 
The spontaneity to become a Godparent is disappearing. When qualified: those with a devout spiritual life, exemplary members of the community are asked to be Godparents often they respond with a shaking of the hand, and refuse. They have already too many to take care of or feel not fit for the job. Often the priests and sisters have to beg the Godparents to assume the task. The second problem at present is the connection between the Godparent and Godchild is weak and after baptism, they very quickly become separated. At the baptism, they were only formally present and lacked responsibility as Godparent. Often after baptism, they forget who the Godparent was. Eventually, the apathy and departure from the community are made easy without the mentoring of a Godparent.
 
Some Protestants have implemented a mentoring system to care for the new believers. They are spiritual guides and counselors to the new believers. This is very similar to the long tradition in Catholicism. Our great treasure has become a mere formality and its meaning lost.

The relationship is one in the Holy Spirit and should be lasting and have a positive impact on the Christian child's religious life. There are many ways to maintain the relationship between Godparents and Godchild. First by regular meetings, secondly be with them as they become catechumens and attend some of the classes. Thirdly, have events for the Godparents in the parish and remind them of their relationship with their Godchild. Fourthly, use their smartphones to connect with their Godchild and lastly attend Mass with the Godchild once a month.

 
He recommends programs for the Godparents to remind them of their relationship and need for prayer. He concludes the article with the example of St Paul the apostle and his spiritual son Timothy as a good model of what a Godfather should be.

What Is True Rest?

A professor of Patrology writes in the Kyeongyang magazine on what is true leisure. He quotes Pope Francis: "The journey through the Decalogue takes us today to the Commandment regarding the day of rest. It sounds like an easy command to respect, but that is the wrong impression. True rest is not simple, because there is false rest and true rest. How can we recognize them?"

 Rest is leaving what we consider toil and difficulties in daily life and do what we ordinarily would want to do if we had the time. We are searching for healing and often see it as emptiness. In this situation, the work we did for pay is now exchanged for fun. But does this type of enjoyment give us rest? Pope Francis says strongly it will not. 

"Today’s society thirsts for amusement and holidays. The entertainment industry is really flourishing, and advertising portrays the ideal world as one great amusement park where everyone has fun. The prevailing concept of life today does not have its center of gravity in activity and commitment but in escapism. Earning money to have fun, to satisfy oneself. The model is the image of a successful person who can afford ample room for diverse forms of enjoyment. But this mentality makes one slip toward the dissatisfaction of a life anesthetized by the fun that is not resting, but alienation and the escape from reality. Man has never rested as much as today, yet man has never experienced as much emptiness as today! Opportunities to amuse oneself, to go out, cruises, travel; but many things do not give you the fullness of heart. Indeed: they do not give you rest" (Sept 5, Audience 2018).

 It is precisely here that we have toxicity. This state is always asking for more, more stimulus, and pleasure will demand more possessions. This is looking for the quick fix and once the stimulus subsides the return to the present is difficult and we have emptiness and apathy. Rest fails to give what is wanted and we have the vicious circle. 

 "Peace is chosen; it cannot be imposed and it is not found by chance. Distancing himself from the bitter wounds of his heart, man needs to make peace with what he is fleeing from. It is necessary to reconcile oneself with one’s own history, with facts that one does not accept, with the difficult parts of one’s own existence. I ask you: is each of you reconciled with your own history? A question to ponder: Am I reconciled with my own history? True peace, in fact, is not about changing one’s own history but about welcoming it and valuing it, just as it has unfolded" (Sept 5, Audience).

 "When does life become beautiful? When we begin to think well of it, whatever our history. When the gift of a doubt makes its way: that all is grace, and that holy thought breaks down the inner wall of dissatisfaction, giving way to authentic rest."

When God becomes the center of our life and God becomes established in our lives, then with rest we will find peace. It is only resting in God we will rid ourselves of stress and what we considered toil and adversity which we found in our daily life will no longer be areas of avoidance, but rather find God's mercy and blessings.

Pope Francis spelled out what true rest is and we can measure it by how beautiful we see human existence. When we can all participate in this confession than we have brought some of the joy of heaven down to earth. And we recite the first verse of Psalm 64 with new meaning: "In God alone, there is rest for my soul."