Feminist Working Mother With No Regrets

A feminist doctor, writing in a recent column in the Korean Times, explains what she understands by the term "working mother." She says that her biology and her role in society do not in any way make her, as a working mother, feel handicapped or victimized.

She realizes that society does not treat women equally with men, especially in the workplace. And as a working mother she knows this first hand, but says that this is a problem of society, not her problem.

She is proud of her biological individuality, her place in the family as a working mother, and her femininity; whether society realizes it or not is immaterial. Her position in society is quite different from many other women; she has a good paying job and admits she is in no position to appreciate all their problems.

However, there are feminists, she feels, who reject the role of women and belittle their unique characteristics. Is it an embarrassment, she asks, to be a woman? Is birthing and raising children an unfair burden amounting to mistreatment and a loss of freedom--women becoming tools of a capitalistic society? Accepting this way of thinking is to look down on the role of women, sometimes expressed by assertions like the following:
Since men are not doing their part in raising a child, I will not either.
Men do not feel responsible for the birth of the child, I will not either.
Men do not partake in housework, and I will not either.
Society does not help in raising a child, and I won't either.
Society makes it hard on a working mother; I will work but not give birth.

The thinking behind these statements is often the understanding that women are giving birth not for themselves but for their husbands or society. Is a woman, she asks, a birthing machine for her husband and society?

The writer hopes that women will work for a society in which a husband and wife will share responsibility for raising their children. When the husband does not act responsibly, the wife should bring it to his attention. Working mothers should ask their husbands to help with the housework. When society does not act as it should, efforts should be made to change society. And, perhaps most important, working women should not look down on the birthing and raising children. She dreams that some day society will appreciate the role of a working mother, seeing it as it should be seen--as magnificent and respected.