In the bulletin of a Pastoral Institute, a mother writes a  meditation on the Sacred Heart of Jesus.  She remembers putting between  the pages of a book a holy card with two rays of light coming from our Lord's heart one red  and one white. In John's Gospel, she goes on to  say, "One of the  soldiers thrust a lance into his side and immediately blood and water  flowed out."
She is the mother of two daughters, one  nine years old and the other is six, they  still need her  help but not like in the past when they trusted in her and she began the  long process of trying to understand  them. They often rested on her  bosom, falling asleep to the  beating of her heart.  She got to know by their cries when they were  hungry or needed a change of diapers. It took time, she says, for them  to get to   know her and she them. 
From the past she remembers the words of a person  who loved potted flowers. They die from either too much water or not enough, by not being  concerned with them or by being too concerned with them. Getting to know  what is needed, she says, is no easy task--as she  learned   raising two daughters.
To learn about  Jesus she  studied  the Scriptures and joined different groups to learn how  to pray. She heard  that small community groups were important and even became a group  leader. But doing so many things just out of habit and doing what others  were doing, she wondered if it wasn't all a great deal of window dressing.
Recently  she began the study of 'listening'.  Some may  think it strange, she says, to have a need to learn how to  listen. But she says she finally realized how deaf she had been, how  often she had been interested in just talking; becoming aware of this  was a painful realization. She has decided to use her daughters, and  even Jesus, in order to practice the art of listening. In her visits to  the Blessed Sacrament   all was done according to rote.She came to realize that she was not interested in listening as much as  persisting in overly thinking her problems and solving them on her own, so much so she was not able to hear any other voice. 
She  goes back to  the picture with the two rays coming from the heart of  Jesus. She knows  they have many different meanings and that she doesn't have the  necessary  knowledge to give a good explanation of what she sees, but  deep down  she  knows it is important to close the mouth and open the ears.                                                      
"One remains silent not knowing how to reply; another remains silent waiting for the right moment." (Sirach 20:6)                                     
 
 
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