Your Happiness Causes My Sadness

Competition is a part of life. An article in the Kyeongyang magazine is entitled: "Your joy makes for my unhappiness." The writer is a professor in a psychiatric department and explains how this phrase is so true in our society. Quotes such as survival of the fittest, and may the best man win are just some of the many words that show we are not dealing with a  win/win situation but rather with a zero-sum situation—I win you lose.
 
The life of young people is filled with competition and it begins early. Not only with grades in school, but in sports, computer games, physical appearance,  dancing and even fist fighting, all objects for competition. Up until they become adults this fight in dealing with the psychological aspects of competition become their primary energy and motivation.
 
When competition becomes excessive it develops into envy and jealousy. Ambition is a good thing, but often, instead of motivating to achieve and imitate the success of others with a positive joy, the energy needed to follow one's desires ends up hating the competitor and we have anger and depravity.
 
Envy and jealousy give rise to false ambition. Seeing the ornaments possessed by a friend or a car, one may have the desire to have the same. We don't bother to figure out if it is necessary or suits us. We have a fake desire, they have it we want it, and  we are heading for trouble. Jealousy will lead to depravity.
 
Another problem with excessive envy and jealousy is depression. Once you compare with others and  acknowledge their intelligence and success and remember one's own short-comings and misfortunes, we may be tempted to tear down the other. Depression often is followed with anger, impulsiveness, and self-indulgence. Not able to express one's 'melancholia' one becomes lost, liquor, games, becoming critical of the world and personality changes are seen.
 
Anger is always in the mix. When we take joy in the failure of another we know something is wrong. If we had the right attitude we would commiserate with the loser and show concern. In competition we always have losers and winners but when the winners take more joy in vanquishing the losers than their own victory we have a serious problem.
 
We live in a competitive world. Envy and jealousy is part of this world but when we have joy in another's loss we are faced with a sad situation. Envy and jealousy are called sins but at the same time we are bringing upon ourselves punishment. We are on this earth only once and living in this way, dark shadows will enter our lives from our actions.