“Therefore, if you are about to offer your gift at the altar and you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar and go away and first be reconciled to your brother. Then return and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)
If you were asked to name the most difficult of the three types of reconciliation, wouldn't most people choose reconciliation with neighbors? Because the hardest thing in life is living with other people. Everyone lives with the wounds caused by others deep in their hearts. The wound remains as a trauma and continues to torment us. The greater the trust, the greater the hurt caused by betrayal.
"I just can’t forgive you. What should I do?” When asked a question like this, he wants to say, “Just live your life hating and cursing,” but we both know that that is not the answer. Just thinking about the person who hurt me and humiliated me makes me shiver. Are you telling me to forgive him? Jesus, who told us to love even our enemies, sometimes criticizes us. Why does he tell us to love our enemies?
But we know. Jesus did not tell us to love our enemies to torment us. So why did God tell us to love our enemies and be reconciled to our neighbors?
Isn't it to take us to a higher place? Our vocation (calling) is high up there. fighting with others is not the purpose of our life. The call to become children of God is deeply embedded in our being. We are children of God and called to true freedom. That freedom is freedom from sin and death, and it is also freedom from resentment, anger, envy, and jealousy.
The discomfort we experience while living with others tells us that there is a path we must walk. Because we are not generous beings we easily turn our backs on others over small things and live with them hurting them. However, there is also a desire within us to go beyond such a life. We want to be free. That freedom is not the freedom to do whatever you want in a place where no one is around, but the freedom that comes from being able to live together. There is freedom that comes from accepting that it is possible, freedom to acknowledge the differences and uniqueness of others, and freedom that comes from acknowledging that although everyone is lacking, they are walking their own path and walking the path of change. There is freedom that comes from a heart that imitates the heart of Jesus and recognizes everyone in the world as brothers and sisters.
We are called to that freedom. Although we are lacking, as we walk the path of following Jesus, we become more like the Lord without even realizing it, our hearts broaden and deepen, and we transform into beings who provide comfort to many people. That's why we can keep walking.
It's okay if you can't forgive now. It's okay if you feel tired and shaken right now. In such cases, instead of suffering because of the lack of forgiveness, let’s talk about those feelings to the Lord in prayer, rely on Him, and ask for comfort. Only the Lord will recognize my difficult heart, sympathize with me, and embrace me. Soon you will gain the strength and courage to stand up again from Him. Only by falling and getting up again can we move forward and imitate Jesus.
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